«We consciously decide what is really important»
Yvonne, 46, and Jim Wennerlid, 50, live with their daughters Elise, 16, and Nova, 14, in Thalwil ZH. Yvonne is a blogger, housewife and student. Jim works as a controller and board member. The couple originally come from Sweden. Due to various illnesses and accidents in recent years, their mother suddenly reached her limits.
Yvonne: "I've always been a very active person and have lived and worked in various countries. I was also involved in sport: I was an apparatus gymnast, coach and judge for many years. After we moved to Switzerland in 2005, I took on various honorary positions in addition to my role as a mother and housewife and my work as a blogger.
Say no sometimes
It all seemed perfectly natural to me until a few unforeseen things happened. My parents live in Sweden and my mum fell seriously ill with dementia. I tried to support my parents, flew back and forth a lot and was constantly on the phone to them. Among other things, my younger daughter had a serious accident with 24 wasp stings, we had several broken bones in the family, concussions, I had to have an operation on my foot.
And suddenly, without me seeing it coming, everything was too much for me. At first I thought I had the stomach flu, but my body was actually reacting to the excessive demands. That's when I knew I had to say no.
I love to laugh. It brings a sense of relief to life.
Yvonne Wennerlid
Fortunately, we are very close in our family. We talked about how I was feeling and what would be good for me and us as a family. There were no appointments in the diary for weeks, we just needed peace and quiet. My daughters were incredibly kind and caring in their response to my condition. They gave me the attention that they get from me. This love gave me a lot of strength.
Since then, I have changed my attitude. I pay more attention to my boundaries. I no longer take on every task and every voluntary position. I'm establishing quiet rituals. I go for walks a lot. When my husband is working from home, we go out together in the morning as soon as the children are out of the house. This walking and talking is a wonderful start to the day.
Time for the family
I also make sure that I don't miss out on time for happy get-togethers with my family and friends. I love to laugh. It brings such a relief to life. But the most important thing is probably to be open with myself. This is my life. I'm allowed to be who I am."
Jim: "It may sound like a cliché, but I often ask myself what is really important to me. I'm heavily involved in my job, but at the same time I want to do my family justice and have time for my wife. I know that I need to feel good physically so that I also feel good mentally.
Phones and tablets are taboo at breakfast.
Jim Wennerlid
Exercise, stretching, sufficient sleep and a balanced diet are all part of my self-care regime. When the children are at home and I'm working from home, we always have breakfast and dinner together. Phones and tablets are taboo. My wife often organises activities together at the weekends, preferably outdoors.
How do I find the time for all this? The hard part is to stop all the little side actions like scrolling through the news or reading an article. I can take better care of my real needs if I keep reminding myself what's important to me."
