What should you do if your grandmother is constantly on her mobile phone?
A father is annoyed that his mother is constantly on her mobile phone with her grandchildren. She soon forgets the requests not to do so. That's what our team of experts says.
One question - three opinions
My wife and I try not to be on our mobile phones too often in front of our children (9 and 7). My mum, on the other hand, has a different approach . When she's with us, after five minutes she has the phone in her hand and the children are glued to the screen with her. If we ask her to play with the children instead, she quickly puts the mobile phone in her bag - and soon forgets the good intention. What should we do?
Marcel, 38, Berne
That's what our team of experts says:
It is actually not good for children's emotional development if carers are too often busy with their smartphones. Studies clearly show this. If the grandmother is not there all the time, the effects will probably not be too harmful for the children. Because the dose makes the poison. The problem lies elsewhere: your mother's behaviour is somewhat disrespectful, especially towards you. She ignores your requests. Address this aspect more clearly. And perhaps she needs ideas on how she can make her time more exciting and interesting for her grandchildren.
Talk to your mum about your observations. And that you are worried that the relationship with your grandchildren could be damaged. There are plenty of studies that show that children don't feel noticed by adults who are always staring at their mobile phones. It's best to send your thoughts to your mum via WhatsApp - then she'll see them too! Then it's up to her to decide how she wants to deal with it. You should put the discussion to rest and let your grandmother be a grandmother in her own way.
Nothing. Different people, different customs. What used to be reading addiction is now screen time: spinal cord softening, brain damage, square eyes are the best-known long-term consequences. Not to mention even more serious side effects. Gaming is of course good, but it can also lead to gaming addiction (a little joke). To put it more seriously: everything is a matter of moderation, and in the case of mobile phone time, I would measure this not in minutes but in half hours, whereby the dangers of a harmful overdose are generally greatly exaggerated.
The team of experts:
- Annette Cina, 52, works at the Institute for Family Research and Counselling at the University of Freiburg. In her own practice, the psychologist, psychotherapist and mother of three counsels young people and adults. Her research focuses on the prevention of child behavioural disorders, couple conflicts, parenting and stress.
- Andrea Jansen, 44, is the founder of the parenting platform Mal-ehrlich.ch. The journalist, entrepreneur and foundation board member was previously a television presenter and producer at SRF. Andrea Jansen has three children aged 7, 9 and 11. She lives with her family in Hawaii and Zurich.
- Peter Schneider, 67, is a psychoanalyst and author. He was Professor of Developmental and Educational Psychology at the University of Bremen from 2014 to 2017 and has been a private lecturer in Clinical Psychology at the University of Zurich since 2014. Peter Schneider is the father of an adult son and lives with his wife in Zurich.
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