I always feel a little inhibited when I compare my situation to that of other single mothers. I don't have any financial worries, which makes a lot of things easier, if not everything. I come from a wealthy background and my ex-husband pays us more in maintenance each month than some people earn in a month.
I studied diplomatic relations and often worked abroad, but since becoming a mother I have been working in Switzerland in a management position at a Scandinavian company. Together with the money I earn , we live above average.
But what does that really mean? I have other things to worry about. Although my son and I travel a lot and lead a comfortable life, I wonder how he will describe growing up without his father in thirty years' time. Will he have children of his own? Will he be living with a woman, or will he also be separated?
I often socialise with mothers who live similarly to me. Most of them work, as a matter of course. I have never struggled with this – on the contrary. I couldn't imagine being a housewife. I've had an au pair at home since my son was little. It may sound cold to other parents, but better a dedicated, loving nanny than a frustrated mother. I've always been lucky in that my son got on well with all the women who worked for us.
My son sees his father more as his godfather or his mother's acquaintance.
My husband and I divorced when our son was barely a year old. At the time, my husband told me clearly that he would always support me financially, but that he wanted to see the world and would not be a good father. That sounded harsh at the time, but now I understand what he meant.
And now this is how it is: I am a single mother, and the father sees the child twice a year. My son sees him more as his mother's godfather or acquaintance than as his father. The advantage of my life situation is that I can decide everything myself. That is a great relief for me.
However, when I had to introduce myself to the other parents at my son's enrolment at the international school with day care a year ago, I felt a little queasy. Until I realised that there were other mothers there on their own as well.
