Pornography in the nursery

My eye-opener happened three years ago: My younger daughter was 10 years old and was interested in different dog breeds. Without giving it much thought, I typed the term «pugs» into the search engine on my laptop. The images generated by the algorithm caught us off guard. I let out an «Oops!» and my daughter unceremoniously slapped her hands over her eyes. What jumped out at us had nothing to do with dogs and was not limited to big naked breasts.

Unintentionally coming across pornographic content online is the norm today. Even primary school pupils come into contact with pornography via their first digital devices. Some of them search for it out of curiosity, while around half of them come across it unintentionally. They almost never talk about it with adults. This was the result of representative surveys of over a thousand young people in Europe.

Pornographic depictions are part of human history. Images of the human sexual act have been produced since prehistoric times. With the development of social media over the last 30 years, the consumption of online pornography in particular has become very widespread - even among minors. This is also on the rise in Switzerland, as a new research study by the University of Zurich shows.

In the case of analogue media, access to pornography for children has been effectively restricted by strict laws in many countries. In the digital world, efforts continue to be unsuccessful. A click that confirms that you are of legal age is usually enough to access explicit content.

Why is this a problem? There are two factors that are particularly critical.

Firstly, the age at which children are confronted with pornographic content: Whether an eleven-year-old watches porn on their first smartphone or a sixteen-year-old makes a big difference. It's like putting schnapps in front of a primary school pupil.

Secondly, they are often violent depictions: Pornography is always problematic when it is physically or psychologically hurtful, discriminatory or marginalising.

Negative effects of pornography on children

Unicef is concerned about the large increase in pornography with extreme content that is easily accessible to children. Exposure to pornography at a young age can have a negative impact on psychosexual health. If children regularly watch pornography that depicts abusive and misogynistic acts, this can lead to this behaviour being classified as normal and acceptable.

A children's charity in the UK asked minors who had seen pornography about their impressions. 70% of the children saw men portrayed as dominant and consensual (sadomasochistic) violence against women much more frequently than against men.

An open culture of dialogue is the best way to protect children and young people from pornography.

According to Swiss Crime Prevention (SCP), several cantons have reported an increase in problems with internet pornography among children and young people in recent years. An animated clip is therefore intended to educate 10 to 16-year-olds about the possible criminal consequences of consuming and distributing pornography.

The questionable SKP clip shows parents who react with outrage and shame when their child comes into contact with illegal pornography. The oddball mother, who ends up watching her child day and night, does not serve as a role model either.

So how can parents support their children and young people in dealing with explicit content online in an enlightened way and protect their sexual integrity without raising a moral finger?

For younger children, setting safety filters on mobile devices is undoubtedly a very important step.

However, all it takes is one child with less attentive parents to undermine these precautions. Teenagers are also often ahead of their parents when it comes to using digital devices and can easily circumvent age restrictions if they want to.

A culture of open dialogue is therefore the best way to protect children and young people.

Out of shame, 96% of the children surveyed did not talk to an adult about their contact with pornography.

Talking to the family about what pornography is about and why it has little to do with sexuality in a relationship can help directly but also indirectly to categorise explicit content. Children should be encouraged to come to their parents if they see things that they do not understand or even find disturbing.

Shame is one of the main factors why 96% of all children and adolescents surveyed did not talk to an adult about their contact with pornography.

Parents are in a particularly good position to guide their children competently if they think about their own attitude to sexuality and pornography. Do they watch porn themselves? How do they feel about a partner watching porn? Is the topic a source of shame for the adults in the household?

For parents who have done little research into the subject or are unsure themselves about what they think about pornography, the internet offers many informative websites to help educate them.

There are various endeavours to make pornography more feminist and more equal. One example is makelovenotporn.tv (Macht Liebe, nicht Porno), where real couples are shown having sex in order to convey positive role models, or there are the «Porny Days», a film and art festival on the subject of physicality and sexuality that takes place annually in Zurich to counteract mainstream pornography.

Pornography does not have to be demonised per se. However, it is clear that porn is not made for children and young people. There is no authority on the internet that checks pornographic content before it lands on a child's or young person's device. If the adults around them don't deal with it, nobody else will.

Well-informed children and young people are better able to judge whether what they see is harmless, whether it is a border crossing or perhaps even a criminal offence that needs to be reported.

Wouldn't it be desirable for them to be able to count on the support of adult carers more often?