My child has nightmares, what should I do?

Recognising the nightmare

• The dream is accompanied by strong negative feelings and often leads to awakening.
• The child is usually quickly orientated after waking up.
• The nightmare often takes place in the second half of the night. It should be distinguished from a startle, which can occur around an hour after falling asleep.

After waking up from the nightmare

Parents can comfort their child by taking their fears seriously. Younger children in particular (four to five-year-olds) are unable to distinguish between dreams and reality. Therefore:

• Physical closeness has a calming effect.
• Ask about the content of the dream.
• Communicate safety: Look behind the curtain, in the wardrobe or under the bed and show that there is no danger.
• Ensure that the parents are there immediately in the event of another nightmare.
• Let the child sleep in their parents' bed if necessary. However, this measure is only useful in the short term - in the long term it will not help the child to overcome their fears themselves.

Before sleeping

Introduce bedtime rituals - for example, telling a calming bedtime story.

• A night light helps the child to orientate itself when it wakes up.
• A cuddly toy in bed makes the child feel less lonely at night.
• Prevent or reduce stress (for example, anxiety-provoking television programmes).

When do you need therapeutic help?

Experience a child:

• Frequently (once a week or more)
• and nightmares over a longer period of time (one month)
• and/or the dreams lead to a significant impairment in one or more areas of life (fear of falling asleep, brooding about the dream, concentration decreases or academic performance drops)

it is advisable to seek psychotherapeutic help.

Treatment based on the IRT method

• Draw the nightmare.
• Change the picture: Ask the child what they can draw in the picture so that they are less afraid. Parents should give as few instructions as possible. The course of the dream does not have to correspond to reality.
• Talk to the child daily for a fortnight about the changed dream story using the picture (not before going to sleep, but during the course of the day).
• Aim: The child actively deals with their fears and finds a solution to overcome them themselves.