Lose and win: Tips for children's games
Mr Fehr, do all children actually like playing board games?
In my experience, not all children enjoy playing parlour games equally - just as there are adults who don't like playing games. The type of game is also important, some children like dice games, others want something with action. Others want something where they have to find solutions to tricky problems. And then it also depends on who they like or don't like to play with.
At what age do children start playing?
Even babies like to play often, children discover their surroundings and learn by playing. Parlour games are a special form of play. These so-called rule-based games, i.e. games with rules, are fun for children from the age of four or five. They can then stick to the rules or deliberately break them. However, this does not necessarily mean that even younger children do not enjoy playing board games. They don't play the rules, but play with the game material. They can have fun with individual figures, or the game box alone is their highlight.
Should children be allowed to win?
Some children are mainly interested in the activity, so winning or losing is not important. For children who like to play competitive games, constant losing can lead to excessive frustration and spoil their enjoyment of board games. Conversely, children realise as soon as they have mastered a rules game when they are allowed to win. This understandably spoils their enjoyment of winning. So it's important to find the right mix. And if you realise that you as an adult are much better at a game than the child, then it's time to look for another game where everyone has an equal chance of winning.
But what do you do when a child just can't lose and is frustrated after every defeat?
In a competitive game, not everyone can win, so losing is part of the game. If you want to be a good player, you also have to learn to lose. However, you can't force this and I would switch to other games for children who find it difficult to lose. There are many games that are co-operative, where you play together as a group against the game. You learn to win and lose together.
Many families will be playing games extensively over the coming festive period. What are your favourite games at the moment?
My favourite thing to do is to get to know new games. My favourite game is always the one that opens up a new world for me. Only a few games manage to do this, but I like to give as many games as possible the chance to do so. So here are five games that I have enjoyed trying out: Dinosaur Island, Scythe, Santa Maria, Captain Sonar and Codenames. These are not family games, but - at least the first three - something for frequent players.
