«If the child isolates themselves, parents should get help»

Ms Diaz, you are considered one of the most influential «body positivity» influencers in Switzerland. What does this term mean to you?

For me, it's about self-love and self-acceptance. I want to love myself and my female body as it is and not have to bow down to unrealistic beauty ideals. But I prefer to call myself a feminist self-love influencer. Along the way, I have learnt that body positivity is a political movement and that from this perspective, I am still considered to be so-called «normatively beautiful».

You became a mum nine months ago. How has your relationship with your body changed since then?

I have even greater respect for what my body can do than before. It started during pregnancy. It's incredible how much your body changes. It also overwhelmed me at times. Fortunately, I was able to experience an uncomplicated pregnancy and enjoyed looking at myself in the mirror.

Why should I squeeze into old trousers just to look slimmer?

And after the birth?

Breastfeeding gave me real cravings and the kilos didn't tumble like some women say. When I still didn't fit into my old jeans months later, I asked myself: why should I squeeze myself into them just to look slimmer? So I bought a new pair a few sizes bigger. This decision was a great relief.

Good to know

What is body positivity?

Image: Rawpixel
Body positivity originally called for the abolition of unrealistic ideals of beauty and more social justice. Numerous studies prove this: Those who do not conform to the common ideal of beauty, i.e. white, slim and standardised beauty, are discriminated against in professional and everyday life.

The movement from the USA, which has spread worldwide through social media, is fighting back against this. There are already over 10 million posts on Instagram under the hashtag Body Positivity.

How did you feel mentally?

At the beginning it was like being on a rollercoaster. I was overjoyed and then had to cry out of nowhere. Sometimes I struggled with myself: Will I be able to juggle everything? Then I said to myself: hey, it's totally okay to be unsure and have doubts as a new mum.

My daughter has taught me to let the critic in me become quieter.

You write on Instagram that your daughter Nerea has made you more gentle with yourself. Can you describe this in more detail?

You treat a baby with incredible love. Be understanding, comfort and cradle it. You talk to it well. Quite different to how you treat yourself. My daughter has taught me to let the harsh critic in me become quieter.

Do you have an example of this?

When I don't succeed at something and I find myself mentally massaging myself, I ask myself: Would I think that way about my daughter and use such harsh words for her? Then I quickly realise: Never! So I try to treat myself just as lovingly and understandingly as I do my daughter.

So body positivity or self-love starts with babies?

Absolutely! Babies should feel loved and comfortable all round. I cuddle a lot with my daughter and take time for her when bathing, cuddling or changing her nappy. She should also be allowed to develop at her own pace. Nerea is already babbling lively, but is not yet interested in crawling. Both are fine as they are.

What would you like to pass on to your daughter?

Nerea is already showing a strong-willed character and we immediately realise when something doesn't suit her. I hope she keeps this up and is always allowed to be herself.

You worked as a primary school teacher until two years ago. At what point does a child's own body and appearance become an issue?

I taught first to third graders and it wasn't a big issue there. But I know from fellow teachers that it can be problematic even at kindergarten age.

You have never had a specific case in your classes?

Yes, once I had a rather chubby child with ADHD who was being bullied. I then discussed it with the class, but unfortunately it backfired.

Another article on the subject of bullying:

What happened?

I started by explaining that there are no standardised shapes, so people look very different and it is not okay to tease others because of their appearance. I explained to the children that fat or thin could only be descriptive and not necessarily hurtful.

And then?

They continued to shout «You're fat» at the child and then coldly said that it wasn't hurtful. However, the context and tone were deliberately provocative and hurtful.

Are self-acceptance and good body awareness covered as school subjects?

It's not in the curriculum. I have taken up the subject when it has presented itself. I once came across a text in which a father wanted to lose weight. The picture showed him with a tiny portion of food on his plate. The children then said sentences like: «The poor man won't get enough of that» or «The father looks sad.» They quickly realised that a strict diet is not healthy and that nutrition is about much more than just food.

What else is it about?

It's about realising when we are full, what really nourishes us and not simply continuing to eat out of frustration. A meal is also a social act: the shared experience, the exchange and being accepted are other important factors.

You suffered from eating disorders for years. When does focussing on the body become problematic for a child?

If everything revolves around appearance, the «right» diet becomes a constant topic and the child becomes more and more isolated, parents should definitely react and not hesitate to get help.