How can I protect my son from violent content?

1. wipe, wipe, wipe ... all these short videos. You'll lose concentration!

They last a few seconds - and captivate for hours: Short videos. Tiktok has them, as does Instagram and Snapchat. Whether they show little hedgehogs bathing or abbreviated political messages, Susanne Walitza, Director of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Psychotherapy at the Psychiatric University Hospital Zurich, sees this as a problem: «The brain gets used to the brevity of videos and information and reading long texts becomes increasingly difficult.» In any case, if this is not practised. The adolescent psychiatrist therefore advises children and young people to keep motivating themselves to read longer texts and books.

Chat histories are not controlled. A child has a right to privacy. You don't read their diary either.

Daniel Süss, media psychologist

2 Should I be «friends» with my daughter on Instagram?

If she agrees, there's nothing to be said against it. But: «I don't recommend imposing or making it compulsory,» says Daniel Süss, Professor of Media Psychology at the Zurich University of Applied Sciences (ZHAW) and Communication Science at the University of Zurich. This also applies to checking chat histories.

«A child has a right to privacy. You don't read their diary either.» More important than control are rules, information about risks and constant dialogue: «Children need to know that they can turn to their parents if they have any difficulties - without having to fear that they will immediately forbid everything.»

3. help, our son wants to become an influencer!

«The desire is understandable and not worrying,» says media psychologist Daniel Süss. There have always been dream jobs, such as film or music star. Now there is also influencer. «Most adolescents with this desire do not realistically expect to achieve this career goal.»

As they get older, young people also realise how stressful the job is and how much commercialisation and little freedom it entails. «And if not, parents can counter their child's misconceptions with an appropriate reality check.»

4 My child is only 11, but really wants to go to Tiktok.

The minimum age for many social networks is 13, for Whatsapp even 16. «However, many younger children are already active on Tiktok or Instagram,» says Yvonne Haldimann, Project Manager for Youth and Media at the Federal Social Insurance Office. Especially as age restrictions are unfortunately still easy to circumvent.

Children under the age of 11 should not be on Tiktok.

Yvonne Haldimann, Project Manager

«If a child expresses a strong interest in this or that platform before the age of 13, parents can consider whether to allow an earlier start depending on the child's maturity.» It goes without saying that the activities should then be all the more closely supervised. And: Haldimann definitely does not recommend Tiktok for children under the age of 11.

5 From images of war to porn: Can we protect adolescents from it?

There is no such thing as one hundred per cent protection. Even if children do not own a mobile phone, they can still come into contact with unsuitable content via their friends' devices. According to the James Study 2024, 36% of 12 to 19-year-olds have already seen videos with violent content on their mobile phones or computers.

In the case of porn videos, the figure is 52 per cent for boys and 16 per cent for girls. Unfortunately, it is more common than you might think for primary school children to be confronted with disturbing images via social media, says child and adolescent psychiatrist Susanne Walitza. «The memories of such images can be very distressing for children.»

To prevent this, various security settings can be made on Tiktok via «Restricted mode». A parent can also connect to the child's account via «Accompanied mode». On Snapchat, parents can gain more insight into their children's activities via «Family Centre».

Youtube Kids is recommended instead of Youtube. And Instagram is in the process of introducing «teen accounts» worldwide with stricter settings for sensitive content. With Tiktok and Instagram, for example, it is also possible to reset content suggestions, i.e. to reset the algorithm. Parents would do well to use these tools. However, it is also important to remain open and not to make anything taboo - so that the child dares to talk about anything incriminating.

6 Since my daughter has been on Instagram, she thinks she's ugly.

All those perfect pictures ... They can make you feel self-conscious, especially when you're a teenager. Here, too, it helps to promote critical awareness. For example, by pointing out that x number of less perfect attempts were first made for an apparently perfect picture. Or how much can be helped with filters.

Media scientist Maya Götz also advises offering counter-readings: «Wow, this picture shows a body that isn't even possible. I don't like that,» you could say, for example. Or encourage people to look elsewhere. One advantage of social networks is that there are also spaces outside of the mainstream that convey «body positivity» , for example.

Almost every second girl experiences cybergrooming - online attempts by adults to make sexual contact.

Yvonne Haldimann

7 What if my child suddenly develops radical opinions?

«Extremist messages, discriminatory values or even fake news are particularly problematic if young people don't deal with these issues in their real social environment,» says media psychologist Daniel Süss.

Parents should therefore repeatedly bring up such content for discussion and set an example of critical questioning to their children at an early age. The question of what is real and what is not is becoming even more central than it already is today in view of the rapidly developing possibilities of artificial intelligence.

8. it scares me that strangers could contact my child.

In fact, social media harbours the risk of cybergrooming - attempts by adults to gain the trust of children online in order to make sexual contact. According to the James Study 2024, around a third of young people have already been approached online by strangers with sexual intentions.

If you only look at girls, the figure is 45 per cent - almost one in two! To prevent this, adolescents should not provide extensive information on their profiles and switch off location services. Contact from strangers should also be blocked as far as possible and the profile should only be accessible to friends.

«Make it clear to your child that not everyone on the internet has good intentions,» says Yvonne Haldimann from Jugend und Medien. And if something does happen: «Don't reproach them.» Instead, block the person in question and report them to the provider, take screenshots to preserve evidence - unless the material can be classified as child pornography, otherwise you would make yourself liable to prosecution - and then go to the police.

9. my favourite thing would be to ban social media!

The desire may be understandable. However, it can become more difficult to realise as children get older. Bans can result in young people feeling misunderstood, as media scientist Maya Götz points out. Media psychologist Daniel Süss believes that if a child is the only one in their environment without social media, they could become an outsider at some point.

Unless several families come to an agreement. This is what movements such as «Smartphone-free childhood» aim to achieve. However, Süss also points out that media skills develop primarily when children are able to gain relevant experience. «The relationship between setting limits and giving freedom must be carefully weighed up.»