«A lot of good things have happened to me»
I was diagnosed with cancer when I was 14. It was said that my brain tumour was prenatal. By the time I was 11, it had started to make itself felt. A lack of folic acid, stomach problems, puberty or the stress of moving house were initially suspected as the cause of the headaches and nausea. Only a facial paralysis led to the diagnosis.
My mum said I had to go to hospital. Then that's what I'll do, I thought: have an operation and that's that. The good thing was that I didn't know what was in store for me: three operations - the longest took eleven hours - one and a half years of treatment with several cycles of chemotherapy and radiotherapy.
I had to practise patience, which I now consider to be my strength.
When all that was behind me, I no longer felt myself - I can't find any other words for the state I was in at the time. I had missed a lot and had to repeat the first second. They wanted to give me time to find my feet. Looking back, I found it hard to understand what the right thing to do was at the time. I was 15, my classmates were 13, and my old friends were dealing with issues that had passed me by.
A support for others
Before the illness, I had been very sporty, but now I couldn't even cycle. My optic nerve had been affected by the radiotherapy, as well as hearing loss, tinnitus, motor problems and reduced memory. I have since been able to make up for the latter with training.
I didn't want any of that: no glasses, no hearing aids, no hair loss. It also turned out that my adrenal cortex and thyroid gland had been damaged and the secretion of vital hormones was impaired. I still have to inject many of them or take them in tablet form.
I learnt to focus on other things when fear and pain threatened to overwhelm me.
Today I work with mentally impaired people. I am firmly established in life and can be a support to others. The experience that things can go up again from the deepest valley has taught me to focus on the positive. I had to work hard to develop this attitude. I had to practise patience, which I now consider to be my strength. I spent hours waiting - for doctors, results, the end of every painful therapy. I learnt to immerse myself in a world of thoughts, to focus on other things when fear and pain threatened to overwhelm me.
My biggest support was my family, who were always there, believed in me and encouraged me. My cat Charly was also very important to me. I also had a mentor during the therapy period. He had the same diagnosis as a child and is involved with the Survivors specialist centre for those affected. It was valuable to be able to turn to someone who knows how young people in my situation feel. I have since volunteered as a mentor myself and regularly attend meetings with other survivors.
I was lucky. I say that not only with regard to my survival, but also in relation to life situations that I encounter in my work. A lot of good things have happened to me, so I want to help people.
