The first mobile phone - dream and nightmare

The first mobile phone: longed for by children, feared by many parents. When the right time has come is an individual question, depending on the child's stage of development and the family culture. There are recommendations for the right age, but some of them differ.

What seems more important to me is whether the child knows how to use their own smartphone safely. Topics such as data security, online safety, questioning the veracity of information and understanding the costs that can be incurred with their own smartphone are key issues that children should already understand.

Many children find it difficult to cope with the overwhelming range of apps such as YouTube or Tiktok.

When introducing the device, parents should also consider the following questions in particular: Which functions do I want to make available to my child? For what purpose? And which apps is it not yet mature enough for? Operating systems such as Android or iOS, as well as mobile providers, offer sophisticated tools that can be used to restrict or completely prevent the use of apps.

In iOS, you can find these options in the «Settings». There you select «Family sharing». Here you can add family members via their account and specify whether the device user is a child or a parent. This allows parents to restrict the use of apps completely or partially.

Let the child have a say

In Android, this works in a similar way with the «Family Link» app. The solution offered may vary depending on the mobile phone provider - it is best to seek advice locally. With these filter functions, parents can largely take control of their child's mobile phone from their own mobile phone. One important function, for example, is the limitation of usage time per day.

If you set up such usage restrictions over the child's head, you miss an important opportunity to explain the risks and challenges of the new gadget to the child. If you do it together, they will learn to understand that they have to give good reasons for new functions or more mobile phone time. Be cautious with the release of apps such as Tiktok and Youtube, as many children find it very difficult to cope with the overwhelming choice.

In social media apps in particular, it is also crucial that parents keep an eye on who is in the circle of friends, who sees what and who is allowed to make contact, at least at the beginning. You can make these settings in the apps together with your child.

On the contrary: what is used, for how long and to what extent should be controlled is constantly changing and is the result of ongoing negotiations between parents and children. Yes, this can be tedious. But it can also be exciting for everyone involved.