Suddenly mum has the day off

Until now, I've always either worked for the office or looked after the children during the day. There has never been a day when I was home alone and neither care work nor paid work was on the agenda. I only had time off in the evenings and I was and still am usually too tired and lazy to do anything useful.

Since the summer holidays, my two boys have also been going to kindergarten on Wednesday mornings. In the first year, they benefited from a reduced workload* - a great thing, by the way. And so I have four hours off during the week just like that.

having is relative

Let's get this out of the way right away: Four hours «free» is relative. Of course, at some point during these four hours I clear the breakfast table, start a load of laundry and prepare lunch, for example. And that's clearly family work, so strictly speaking it's not free time. Just like housewives and househusbands don't have time off when they're managing the family.

And yet this Wednesday morning is very special for me. My time is freely available and undisturbed, appointments with the doctor or hairdresser can be planned without having to organise separate hats. I haven't had that for a long time.

The first morning off ends in frustration

I'm really looking forward to the first free Wednesday morning after the summer holidays. Among other things, I plan a jogging tour, clothes clearance and bread baking session while listening to an exciting podcast. The result: I didn't come close to completing my programme and was frustrated. So: new self-reflection and a streamlined programme.

I'll start from the beginning with my thoughts:

• My children have enjoyed going to school and kindergarten almost without exception. I think they are in good hands there and they have great teachers. So I don't feel guilty that they would rather be at home.
• I can't be too strict with myself and fall into an optimisation frenzy. Wednesday morning is mine, I can do whatever I want. If tidying the cellar makes me happy, then that's just as okay as lying in bed and watching series or going for a run and then treating myself to a manicure.

The next Wednesday works better, I do me-time without pressure and tidy up something. When talking to friends, I notice that many families have been planning this free time for a long time, even with younger children. They use it for themselves, sometimes the mum, sometimes the dad, or as a buffer if a child has been ill and work in or outside the household has to be caught up on. A good idea! The hamster wheel aka work-life balance can be consciously stopped and restarted.

Speaking of series: With all this in mind, I watch the Japanese series «The House on the Slope». A young mother is called in as a lay judge to help decide the case of another mother who allegedly drowned her child. The series illuminates the everyday family life of this stressed and overwhelmed mother in Japan in such a vivid way that it sheds a new light on my own thoughts of luxury on Wednesday mornings.

And so I'm looking forward to my next Wednesday. Whether with the series, in the cellar or at the race.

*What is the reduced workload?

In the canton of Bern, kindergarten children can attend the first year of kindergarten with a reduced workload. What exactly this means is determined for each school. In our case, it meant that they could be left at home for one afternoon and/or Wednesday morning without any red tape. After consultation, the workload could then be increased in the first year. Both of my children wanted to stay at home on Wednesday mornings until the end of the first school year. Find out more: www.erz.be