School anxiety: «I already felt sick at home in the morning»

Mia* lives in the canton of Bern and is 9 years old. She has no siblings. Her parents both work. Her father Andreas* works from home and was able to look after Mia when she had to stay at home longer due to illness. When she no longer wanted to go to school after her recovery, she reacted well, he says.

* Names changed by the editors

Mia: "I couldn't go to school for a long time last winter because I was ill. After that, everything was strange. My best friend suddenly preferred playing with other children to me and had also moved to a different seat. And I couldn't keep up with my lessons because I had missed things. Suddenly I was always afraid when I saw the teacher that she might pick on me and I wouldn't know the answer.

When I went to school, my head was completely empty and I wished I was invisible.

I already felt sick at home in the morning and couldn't eat breakfast properly. My parents then allowed me to stay at home. I was able to do my homework well. But when I went to school, my head was somehow completely empty and I wished I was invisible so that the teacher wouldn't see me and ask me questions.

At some point, however, my parents had a conversation with my teacher. Now I go to a school psychologist. She shows me what I can do if I don't feel up to going to school in the morning. We practised difficult situations for me in role plays. She taught mebreathing exercises and told me that it helps if I talk openly about my fears. There is also a girl from my class who now always picks me up at home."

Fear of no longer being able to keep up at school

Andreas: "Mia was a very good pupil right from the start, she is very ambitious. Even when she went back to school after her long illness, she still got good grades even though she had missed a lot. That's why it was difficult for us to understand where her fear of not being able to keep up in class suddenly came from.

We suspect there were also social anxieties, the class community had developed without her and she had to find her place in it again. We didn't think about any of these things when she started school again. We are glad that the school is supporting us well and we all hope that Mia will soon be able to go back to school with more joy and less anxiety."