How can parents help the smartphone generation?
Giorgio Macaluso is a jovial, grey-haired gentleman who normally stands by the bulge in the middle of his body. «A man without a belly is like a house without a balcony,» he says on his Facebook wall. Right now, however, the man with glasses and a moustache calls himself «evi16». He logs into the chat portal Chatmania.ch under this name. Several chat windows pop up at once. People with male nicknames write to the young Evi. «How are you?», «Are you really that young?», «Are you looking a bit older?», «I'm already 32 - bad?», «Are you open?» Macaluso does his best to answer quickly everywhere. He claims to be open, blond, blue-eyed and slim.
Many parents feel overwhelmed by what their children are doing with the media today.
What the users at the other end don't realise is that «evi16» doesn't just look nothing like their dream image. The chat they have here is not private either. The users' words are projected onto a screen. Around 60 parents sit in the upper school centre at Wattenwil school and watch.
Many of them laugh out loud, which is fuelled by the instructor's relaxed manner: «Am I open-minded? What would you say? Yes, I'm an open-minded guy, aren't I? So I'll just say yes.» But the laughter is repeatedly interrupted by a murmur. Because the users in the chat quickly get down to business. It takes less than five minutes for the first person to ask: «Hesch grossi Brüscht?» At this moment, media course instructor Macaluso cancels the live chat. «And how will you react in future if your daughter says: «I want to meet someone I met on the internet»?» There is a shocked silence in the room.
Online dossier on media consumption
Many parents feel overwhelmed by what their children are doing with the media these days. Almost every day, their offspring tell them about a new app, a new game or they want to sign up to a cool social network. The questions of whether, when, for how long and for what purpose children should use media mean that media educators are in high demand.
Offers such as courses, brochures and websites on the subject are springing up like mushrooms. The number of pieces of advice and rules is growing in line with the number of opportunities that new media bring. And it is not uncommon for experts to contradict each other, which further confuses parents. The website of the national media literacy programme «Youth and Media» currently lists more than 500 advisory services in Switzerland. Swisscom's media courses alone are attended by around 6500 parents and teachers every year.
«Sometimes I find it frightening what I have to watch out for,» says Manfred Nafzger, a father, at the Swisscom media course in Wattenwil. «I'm afraid that at some point you don't listen to your gut feeling any more.» Other parents gratefully soak up every tip - and pass it on. «I often told my daughter that you shouldn't look at the screen for half an hour before and after homework. But she only believed me when it was in the newspaper,» says the mother of a 13-year-old from Lengenbühl. An older father in the back rows says that he doesn't find it difficult to be a good role model - after all, he is a self-confessed mobile phone abstainer.
Media fulfil basic needs
Being abstinent, just letting it go - many parents would like their children to do the same. This wish is understandable, as few parents are able to keep up completely or assess the consequences of media developments. «We are the mediators of skills that we don't yet know where they will lead,» said French sociologist Divina Frau at a specialist forum on youth media protection in Bern.
In addition, the risks for young media users are the focus of newspaper and television reports. These give the impression that children are only bullied on Facebook, that only paedophiles talk to them in chat rooms, that games are addictive, that windows with violent and pornographic videos pop up everywhere on the internet and that apps on smartphones are only there to harvest data and charge credit cards.
Even the cavemen proudly painted selfies of themselves hunting on the wall.
This fear is not an unknown phenomenon. New media has always had an image problem - starting with books. Even back then, it was said that reading was dangerous and kept young people away from real life. However, media are not created for no reason; they fulfil human needs. With books, newspapers, magazines, radio plays, radio and TV, these were still the needs for entertainment and information. Communication only went in one direction: from the medium to the user. Things are very different today: the internet, especially mobile internet on smartphones and tablets, enables much more. For example, it is also used for communicating with each other and, of course, for self-expression.
Media coach Macaluso compares the photos that young people post on Instagram to cave paintings. Even in prehistoric times, people would have painted a kind of «selfie» of themselves on the hunt. «Apparently it's a basic need: 'Look what I've done today!» And parents who prohibit young people from accessing WhatsApp groups should know that they are destroying friendships.
Scientists today are primarily concerned with the question of whether some needs are already over-fulfilled and what consequences this has. «Suddenly it's possible to communicate everywhere - whether in the toilet or in the lecture theatre. You don't have to be alone with yourself for a second. And maybe you can't even do it anymore,» says media scientist Peter Vorderer.
Sara Signer from the international research project «EU Kids online» also sees the main danger for digital natives in the fact that they can give in to boredom, the urge to play or loneliness at any time. As a result, they only develop a very low frustration tolerance. The motto is: I want everything, and I want it now!
Children's brains are easily distracted
You can even see the low frustration tolerance. At least if, like Lutz Jäncke, Professor of Neuropsychology at the University of Zurich, you look at the brain, or more precisely at the frontal cortex. In our society, this does not reach its full size on average until the age of 18. «This is the reason why young people are particularly susceptible to distractions, why they find it so difficult to control impulses and remain attentive to a task for long periods of time,» says Jäncke. The media not only offer a variety of alternative activities, but often also immediate rewards: contact with friends, the feeling of happiness when listening to music, winning crisps and shouts of bravo when playing games.
Media offer many alternative activities. Homework can hardly keep up with this.
Homework is difficult to keep up with because the reward, for example graduating from school, is uncertain and lies in the distant future. «Working for a delayed reward is very difficult for young people due to brain development,» explains Jäncke. So it is not just the media that is distracting, it is also the child's brain that is particularly easily distracted. And the crux of the matter is that the more often this impulse is followed, the slower the frontal cortex develops.
A study by Stanford University has shown that multimedia users who multitask a lot are more easily distracted, work more slowly and even memorise less. So multitasking is a myth. Jäncke: «I would advise parents to get their children to do things one at a time. Music and WhatsApp are something for breaks to relax. And they should only play games when everything is finished. This is because the rewarding stimuli in a computer game act almost like drugs on the brain. After that, it's difficult to get back to homework.»
The rewarding stimuli in a computer game act almost like drugs on the brain.
Many parents are also concerned that media can have a negative impact on a young person's psyche. Gregor Waller, Head of Media Psychology at the Zurich University of Applied Sciences (ZHAW), is investigating this. He can give the all-clear to some extent: Long-term consequences of negative media experiences are rare.
«LIKE» me!
Short-term effects such as nightmares after a bad film are common, but they can even be helpful. «The child's psyche has to learn - sometimes with the support of parents or siblings - to process these impressions. By successfully processing them, the child builds up coping skills in order to be better equipped for future events of this kind,» says Waller. A person's personality is made up of genetic and environmental factors.
Ultimately, media experiences are only a small piece of the puzzle. Feedback from peers is particularly important in the adolescent phase - and «likes» on the internet are an ideal means of achieving this. «Young people encourage each other and cement their relationships,» says Waller. The reach is much greater than without the internet. And clicking a «like» takes much less work and requires less courage than giving a compliment in real life.
A young person's personality is also reflected in their online behaviour. Waller: «Extraverted or insecure young people also seek more attention and affirmation online.» However, digital «fishing for compliments» becomes less important over time and feedback in offline life becomes more important. Only a few young people take the search for confirmation to an exaggerated level, says Waller.
On the other hand, the idealised depictions of young people on Instagram and the like are a recurring problem. With filters and photo editing programs, normal people suddenly look like models. According to a ZHAW study, this has a negative effect on the self-confidence of around a fifth of young people. But that's only one side of the coin. Waller: «The internet also offers many points of contact, role models and role models at eye level who can help young people with their own development.»
Young people find distorted ideals online - but also role models at eye level.
If you ask the media psychologist how parents can best support their children, he answers the same as many media educators: it takes time, dialogue and genuine interest. After all, a good relationship with parents is the most important protection - both online and offline.
Being a role model - right from the start
Precisely because a trusting relationship is also so important in media matters, many experts are of the opinion that media education cannot start early enough. «It actually starts at birth,» says Bo Reichlin, initiator of mediolino.ch, a programme that promotes media education in crèches, kindergartens and families. Media education initially takes place indirectly - by children observing what their parents do with media.
In addition to the role model role, the important role as a companion comes later, even if children watch apparently harmless things like «Maya the Bee». «To understand media messages, children need to understand more complex narrative structures. They need to read body language and facial expressions and distinguish reality from fiction,» says Reichlin. On average, children only learn the latter between the ages of five and seven. "I can only recommend that parents exercise moderation, explain content if necessary and keep checking the child's level of development."
The well-known neurobiologist Gerald Hüther would like to keep children completely away from screens until they reach school age: «In order to build up the most important neuronal circuits in the brain, children need one thing above all: their own physical experiences. And children don't gain this in front of a screen, no matter what programme is running,» he said in an interview with «GEO kompakt».
Media and communication scientist Bo Reichlin advises against such abstinence and explains this with a comparison: «Even if a family gives up the car out of conviction - the traffic is there, children have to learn to deal with it. It's similar with the media.» Because by the time they get to school, children will have their classmates' smartphones in their hands and be surfing the internet on school PCs.
Prohibit little, accompany a lot and be there when something happens!
It is perhaps a coincidence that Giorgio Macaluso also uses a metaphor from road traffic for the media course in Wattenwil. He says that good media education requires an ABS and an airbag. The ABS is the support of the parents. «If you find out about a film in advance, watch it with your son and then talk to him about it afterwards, it's not efficient at first,» jokes Macaluso. «But it's important so that your son can do it on his own at some point.» He sees technical aids such as filters and special browsers and children's search engines, which are designed to prevent children from accidentally coming across porn and violence, as an airbag. Examples include frag-finn.de and Blinde Kuh.
One could add that rules also offer safety. This applies to the age recommendations of the manufacturer and the PEGI as well as internal family agreements. These can be recorded in self-drafted contracts. As road traffic regulations, so to speak. "And then, of course, it's important that you don't put your child on a Harley straight away - let them practise on a tricycle instead. It doesn't always have to be a smartphone - and if it is, you can deactivate many of the functions there," says Macaluso.
And what does all this mean for the daughter who wants to meet her internet acquaintance? «Don't let her!» suggests a voice from among the parents at the school in Wattenwil. Media coach Macaluso raises his eyebrows. «How do you know your daughter won't go all the more?» A few heads nod vigorously.
«Go with her. Tell her: 'You can go. I'm at the next table, hiding behind a newspaper. And if the cute 16-year-old really comes and you give me a sign, I'll disappear. But if someone else comes, I'll be there to help you!» And this principle can probably be applied to media education as a whole: prohibit little, provide lots of support and, above all, be there when mistakes happen.
This article is from our large media dossier from issue 08/15 (order here). It was updated in August 2018.
Five guidelines for media education
- Talk to your child about what they do with the media. Show an honest interest and learn something yourself.
- Check your own media use. Are you a good role model for your children?
- Offer alternatives. After all, why shouldn't your child be glued to their mobile phone when there's nothing else going on?
- Set rules for media use together with your child - and also take note of the age ratings for films, social networks, apps and games.
- Inform yourself about the risks and make your child aware of them.
Read more:
- «Social media is as addictive as cocaine,» says Austrian psychiatrist Dr Kurosch Yazdi - the addiction specialist in an interview about the «digital drug» social media and the danger for children and young people of losing themselves in it.
- «Social networks are the children's revenge!»
- 22 questions and answers on media education
