Andrea, 36, a qualified bank clerk, and Jose Debrunner, 43, a plumber, live in Zurich with their three children: Liandro, 9, Elias, 4, and Noah, 1.
Jose: «Here in Switzerland, we're something of an exception with our three children. I see lots of families who only have one child. Then it somehow seems to work out with childcare at the nursery, with two jobs, and with their careers. Many don't have any relatives to help out either, because they live far away. That's the case with my family too.»
Going to work after only three hours’ sleep, on top of the emotional separation from the children or the pressure if one of them falls ill, would be too much stress for me.
Andrea, full-time mum
Andrea: «My husband is from the Dominican Republic. Over there, it's quite normal to have lots of children and to have them at a much younger age. So you have your parents and often your grandparents living with you , as well as your siblings. There's always someone there to look after you; you don't even have to ask – it's just part of life. I think that's lovely.»
Jose: «We would actually have liked to have had children much earlier. But we waited until I'd finished my apprenticeship as a plumber. And Andrea did some further training so she could get back into the workforce more easily later on. During that time, we were also able to save some money, and Andrea can now look after the children full-time.»
Great appreciation from the family
Andrea: «I take my hat off to all the families where both parents work. But for us, that would be too much stress at the moment : having to drop everyone off somewhere in the morning, going to work after just three hours’ sleep, not to mention the emotional separation from the children or the pressure when one of them falls ill. I simply really enjoy being a full-time mum and housewife and watching the children grow up.»
Jose's mum and I were at home. That had a big impact on us.
Andrea
My family really appreciates this about me. I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything career-wise either. But when it comes to the outside world, I'm still careful about who I tell, because I've found time and again that I'm ridiculed or criticised for this decision.
«But I find that the time when you really need your children is simply very short. I wouldn't want to miss it for the world. And for that, we're happy to accept the financial sacrifices that come with living on just one income.»
Why no Dad's Day?
Jose: «We simply don't have two cars. We don't go to restaurants or go on expensive hotel holidays. More expensive items or leisure activities, such as an annual pass for the zoo or a skiing holiday, are gifts that the children ask their grandparents or godparents for.»
Andrea: «The children do sometimes ask me why I don't go to work, or why other families have a «Dad's day» but in our family it's always just me at home during the day. But I think they appreciate it, just as I used to appreciate it. My mum was always at home too when I came home at lunchtime, and she was the one who drove us to our hobbies. I think that's shaped me and Jose – the fact that we grew up that way too.»
