«Wear braces and you'll be more beautiful!»
How did you explain to your child why they needed braces? My parents told me that I would look nicer with straight teeth and would be more appealing to men.
Yes, I know. Today, this explanation makes my toenails curl up. But I have to defend my parents: My teeth were a terrible quarry - old and new teeth criss-crossed, a chin that «receded» backwards and the new teeth were far too big for my mouth. The before and after plaster casts of my teeth are still on display in the glass cabinet in my orthodontist's waiting room: a quarry before, a string of pearls after.
Why would I want to please the boys? Boys were stupid anyway!
But my parents' argument was not only pedagogically dubious, it completely failed with seven-year-old Bianca. Because I thought I looked great the way I did. The pushed-back chin made me special. And what did I care about boys? I only remember the rest of the details of the trial in fragments. I tried to put my parents off until later, they argued that braces were very expensive and that health insurance subsidies would be cancelled later. In the end, I think they dropped the arguments and decided that there would be braces - that's it! Parents don't have to explain everything.
What followed was seven years of ordeal with fixed braces, loose braces, a frame around the head, wire behind the teeth, a total of twelve extracted teeth, including four of the second teeth (plus four wisdom teeth) and a cut frenulum. To top it all off, my orthodontist was a child-hating sadist. Instead of telling me to open my mouth wider, he drilled his thumbs into my jaw joint. Try this on for size: You scream «Ahhh» - and your mouth is wide open!
When the braces were removed, I was shocked
When boys actually started to interest me, I wore a garden hat. When I smiled at my crush Manuel, it flashed silver. Manuel didn't mind - after all, almost all girls wore braces. The day he held my hand in the cinema, I was bursting with happiness.
A week later, the braces were removed. I was shocked when I saw myself in the mirror. Who was this woman? Without the silver nuggets and wires, my teeth looked huge. Big, white shovels. And I had suddenly aged two years. Manuel noticed that too: The shy glances in maths class came to an abrupt end. I cried and insulted my parents as only teenagers do: «I lied to myself! Boys think I'm ugly!»
Today, of course, I am happy with my even teeth and know that my parents only wanted the best for me. But if you, dear parents, want to make braces palatable to your children, you'd better be careful how you argue. Not all Manuels and Manuelas like straight teeth. Perhaps you'd be better off claiming that you can't chew your favourite food with such crooked teeth? Or that the tooth fairy ignores such teeth? Or simply say straight away: «We're going to do it like this - that's it!»
Picture: Fotolia.de
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Read more:
- Denture construction site: Everything parents need to know about braces