The youth of today? A reason to be happy!
What is wrong with «today's youth»? If you believe many media reports and portrayals in books, then they are incapable of relationships, self-centred bullies, only function according to the pleasure principle, cannot concentrate, are only glued to their smartphones, have behavioural problems, are consumer-oriented, apolitical and irresponsible.
This image bothers me. There are countless claims like this circulating on social networks, but they don't do our young people justice. And they alienate us from each other.
I was all the more pleased to see how much attention the speech by Greta Thunberg received - a 16-year-old who believes that «you're never too small to make a difference» and who had the courage to tell the world's most powerful people off in front of the cameras at the climate summit in Poland.
Since August 2018, she has been skipping school on Fridays to draw attention to the impending climate catastrophe - initially against the wishes of her parents and massive external pressure, but with increasing support over time. She has now been able to mobilise tens of thousands of schoolchildren worldwide to take part in climate strikes.
Greta Thunberg is just one example of many. The environment is also very close to Felix Finkbeiner's heart. He told the Frankfurter Allgemeine newspaper: «We children feel like we're being taken for a ride.» But instead of being paralysed, he took action himself and started planting trees. At the age of nine, he founded the environmental organisation «Plant-for-the-Planet», which is now active in over 50 countries.
«You're not grown up enough to tell the truth,» complains environmental activist Greta Thunberg. «You even leave this burden to us children.»
But it's not just environmental problems that children and young people are tackling: In September 2018, seven-year-old Emil from Hamburg had enough of his father constantly staring at his smartphone - and started a children's demonstration under the slogan «We are here, we are loud because you only look at your mobile phone!».
If you keep your eyes open, you will see children and young people everywhere who not only dare to speak their minds and stand by their feelings, but also actively campaign for their goals and get things moving.
What particularly amazes me is that they do this in a calm, thoughtful and responsible way that we must respect.
Speeches and demonstrations are the events we hear about in the media. If you talk to young people, you will find many examples in everyday life. Young people who set themselves goals, take responsibility, care for others, for whom values such as family, friendship, justice and the environment are important.
Even if the media give us a different picture or want to turn these findings into a negative with a headline such as «Generation well-behaved»: Young people today smoke and drink less (WHO 2016) and actively endeavour to lead a healthy lifestyle (Youth Barometer 2018). They take school, work and study seriously (Juvenir 4.0) and have a better relationship with their parents than previous generations.
The parents of today
As parents, we can be proud of this development. Even that is almost embarrassing for us today. The trend is to get upset, feel guilty and point the finger at negative examples - helicopter parents, parents who only want to be friends with their children instead of bringing them up, and so on.
Of course they exist: the neglectful, overprotective, controlling parents - we can all think of examples. But there are also so many parents who do their job well. Parents who treat their children with love and warmth without spoiling them. Parents who set boundaries and give their children security without humiliating or punishing them. Parents who raise their children to be empathetic, self-confident people who can think for themselves and stand up for themselves and their needs.
It's a shame that Emil's parents stare at their mobile phones too much. On the other hand, they have a son who realises at the age of seven that this is not good for him, who has the courage to express this, finds a constructive solution and even motivates others to become active. These are parents who are brave enough to deal with this message and support their son in his protest.
In the past, there were also fathers who disappeared behind the newspaper and hardly got involved in the dinner conversation - but they would hardly have taken a complaint from a seven-year-old child as an opportunity to scrutinise themselves.
Today's young people don't make it easy for us
People like Greta are uncomfortable. They say things to us like: «You're not even grown up enough to tell the truth. You even leave this burden to us children.» And we feel caught out, perhaps ashamed, hopefully shaken awake.
We are raising a youth that is demanding, that challenges us, whose respect we must prove worthy of. We adults can no longer hide behind status, titles and roles. More and more young people are asking «why» and are not satisfied with «that's why», «you're doing it because we say so» or «don't think about it, just do it».
Young people take on responsibility, set themselves
goals, take care of others.
Values such as family
and the environment are important to them.
If we want young people to think for themselves, then we have to be prepared to be confronted. This sometimes hurts and unsettles us. But it gives us the chance to question the status quo and look for better answers.
The child and adolescent psychiatrist Michael Winterhoff, author of the book «Why our children become bullies», said in an interview in this magazine: «...because that's how a child's psyche works: What it does, it does for me. When I praise it, it beams, it always seeks my feedback. Only 14-year-olds start to question things - if they are normally developed. At 16, they are ready to weigh up what they should and shouldn't do.»
Children and teenagers like Greta, Felix and Emil would probably only have a weary smile for such an assessment. A reason to be happy.
Read more from Fabian Grolimund:
- «Gell Dad, you're not really stupid»
- Why not let your children have a say!
- My child is afraid of new things