Sex education at school in the age of internet porn
Sexual education is also the responsibility of schools. But how do you educate young people who have already seen everything on the internet? More and more schools are bringing in outside help - from young medical students, for example. And then suddenly words come up that you never hear in class.
Until now, the girls at secondary school A in Richterswil thought they knew their classmates quite well. But when the blackboard is turned over, they are shocked. Some of them open their mouths in disbelief. One girl turns her head away and hides behind her mane of blonde hair. "Cock", "dick", "fuckstick", "Ferrari", "Fredi" ... the synonyms the boys have found for the word "penis" are dirty, creative and sometimes bizarre. There are 19 names in total. The girls found just 5 on the other side of the board - and they were as good as "dick" or "member". Well, maybe the game was a bit unfair: you probably think more about the penis when you have one yourself. "The women get another chance," says Frederic Thiele promptly, adding with a wink: "Now you know what makes the boys tick." He folds the board over again so that the girls and boys can't see each other.
"And now write down all the synonyms you can think of for 'having sex'." Again, there is excited squeaking of chalk - only drowned out by loud laughter from the boys, while the girls discuss in whispers. And although they are the only ones who have come up with the beautiful - and obvious - term "making love", they are again behind the boys: 9 to 22 terms this time. Strange positional descriptions such as "diagonal" and "vertical" have already been deducted. "Guys, what does that even mean?" asks Frederic Thiele. "Vertical is in a handstand and diagonal is when the legs are scissor-like into each other," explains one pupil.
"How do we want to express ourselves?"
The games at the start of the educational workshop run by the organisation "Achtung Liebe" are fun, but not an end in themselves. The two medical students Frederic Thiele and Anna Schmidt first want to find out where the pupils stand. What do they know? How do they express themselves? Thiele's judgement is pretty quick: "The boys have probably all seen porn." And since the worst words are already on the board anyway, they decide how they want to express themselves in the workshop. "So cunt-sucking isn't really appropriate, is it? We'd rather not use that," decides Anna Schmidt. But the pupils don't like the medical terms either. They agree on "Schwengel", "Mumu" and "Liebe machen". And then it's time for the dry part - the anatomy. The 13-year-old A-level students wave it off: They know all about that. But when Anna Schmidt explains once again exactly how the menstrual cycle works and why women can theoretically always get pregnant, it is suddenly as quiet as a mouse.
The teacher even flinches at the word "horny". He is happy to leave the field to others.
It's not quite that simple - but it's pretty important. During the break, class teacher Thomas Truog drops by briefly to ask if everything is OK. Then he disappears again. When the "Achtung Liebe" team is in the classroom, teachers are not allowed in. "That's a good thing," says the teacher. And not just because the medical students have better expertise than he does: "I'm over 60 and, to be honest, I still cringe when students say 'horny', even though it's quite normal these days."
Teachers have no access
Anna Schmidt, who is also President of the organisation "Achtung Liebe" Switzerland, adds: "When the teachers are in the room with him, they don't ask such open questions. They see us once and then never again - what's more, we speak a similar language to the young people." The principle of peer education is well received in sex education lessons. "Achtung Liebe" has existed since 2001, but has only grown considerably in recent years. There are programmes around Zurich, Bern and Basel and initial trials in Ticino. In total, the volunteer students visit between 150 and 200 school classes per year.
The condom is actually only tested on the "dressed" banana.
They are prepared for their assignments in workshops lasting several days with doctors and sex educators. And "Achtung Liebe" are not the only ones to offer sex education sessions in schools. For example, employees from the "Lust und Frust" specialist centre also visit classes. In French-speaking Switzerland, sex education only takes place with external sexual health specialists. Why do schools like to have sex education organised? Teachers are often uncomfortable talking to pupils about sexuality - that's actually always been the case. They also like to rely on external expertise because teacher training does not prepare them for sex education lessons.
It's okay to talk about lust
And many people also don't realise what needs to be taught about sexuality at school. "According to current school laws, it can happen that pupils are only confronted with anatomical knowledge throughout their school years - and never discuss what is actually normal," says Arabel Mettler from "Sexual Health Switzerland" - the umbrella organisation to which "Achtung Liebe" also belongs. "Many are never encouraged to think about what kind of sexuality they want."
Her organisation wants sex education that goes beyond teaching anatomy, sexually transmitted diseases and violence prevention and has a positive approach. In other words, it should also be possible to talk about lust. Especially since young people come into contact with hardcore pornography so easily, they have many questions and are looking for guidance. And that is precisely why "Achtung Liebe" does not leave out the topic of porn. Frederic Thiele draws a stick woman with huge breasts and a stick man with a huge penis on the blackboard. The woman bends over, the man comes from behind.
"For girls, onanism is often still a real taboo subject." Anna Schmid is a final-year medical student and president of the organisation "Achtung Liebe" Schweiz.
"What is that? That's right, porn! But what? Isn't there something else missing?" The boys nod eagerly. "What's missing?" "Lights!", "Camera", "Director", "Close-ups", the pupils give cues, Thiele draws and the board gets fuller and fuller. And at the latest when the question of who earns how much money with it comes into play, the pupils realise: "They don't want to show how sex works - they're showing something completely different. They're just making a film to make money and get clicks."
Of course, such words do not erase the images in the minds of the 13-year-old boys. This becomes clear when the boys and girls are then allowed to ask and answer each other's questions anonymously. While the girls formulate well-behaved questions such as: "What do you actually talk about in the changing room? You're always laughing like that", the boys want to know: "Do you moan?", "Are you horny right now?", "What turns you on?". The girls' answers are "No!", "Rubbish!", and a boy should above all be "sweet, funny and attentive". And then there's the shock that apparently not all women shave their legs in winter.
"Are you moaning?", "Are you horny right now?", "What turns you on?"
"What?" shouts a boy with a disgusted look on his face, and his classmate replies patronisingly: "Yes, why should we? No one can see." The girls in the girls' group reveal that they find all the boys' sex behaviour childish. They themselves have never watched porn and don't masturbate either. "The difference is typical for teenagers of that age," says Anna Schmidt. However, she doesn't quite believe the girls' innocence. They would probably prefer to keep their first experiences to themselves. "Masturbation simply has a completely different taboo for girls than it does for boys."
Anatomical or holistic?
"Sexual Health Switzerland" aims to provide holistic sex education. Young people should be empowered to know and respect their own desires and boundaries - which ultimately leads to everyone deciding for themselves how they want to live their sexuality, even outside of the usual role models. This understanding also means that homosexuality is not devalued. However, when the topic of same-sex love comes up in the "Achtung Liebe" workshop, the boys let out a loud snort. And the idea that homosexuals could have children is generally met with disapproval. "Because they'll have a hard time explaining to their friends why they have two mums," says one girl. "It's just unnatural - our bodies are made for men and women to have sex," adds her classmate. "Really?" asks Anna Schmidt. "And what if I told you that homosexuality has always existed and that it's also normal in many animal species?" The boy shrugs his shoulders gruffly.
Some pupils only learn about anatomy at school and never really talk about sex.
Turning to the girl, the two medical students suggest that they can do something to change the way children of homosexuals feel - by not making it so difficult for them. "The fact that homosexuality triggers such a reaction is something we often experience at that age," says Anna Schmidt. This often only changes when the young people are older - and have experienced homosexuality in their circle of friends, for example. Just like a lot of things change when sexuality no longer only exists in theory and in porn videos, but also when they have their first experiences. Then perhaps the boys will also remember the term "making love" for "having sex".
Sex education in German-speaking Switzerland
According to the organisation "Sexual Health Switzerland", sex education in German-speaking Switzerland is divided into three cycles: In kindergarten, children from the age of four are taught basic body knowledge - for example, the difference between boys and girls and how to deal with emotions. In addition, initial violence prevention takes place by teaching children that they themselves decide when and how they are touched. In the third to ninth school year, biology lessons cover the body and puberty as well as the socially different behaviour of men and women. From the tenth grade onwards, sex education, as most people know it, is part of the curriculum. In many cantons and schools, this remains limited to anatomical knowledge. For example: How do you get pregnant? How do the sexual organs work?
Schools are also legally obliged to provide preventative information on the topics of violence and sexually transmitted diseases. One focus is on HIV/Aids prevention. In July 2015, a petition for a referendum was withdrawn by the initiators, who wanted to ban sex education for children under the age of nine and make it voluntary up to the age of twelve. The referendum was prompted by a "sex box" with plush vaginas and penises that caused a stir at schools in Basel. While sex education is organised very differently in the German-speaking part of Switzerland, there are clear standards in Romandy and lessons are generally taught by external sexual health specialists
