«My children are the greatest gift for me»

I tell

"The bond with my children is much closer and more emotional than my own bond with my parents. It was more hierarchical, more authoritarian, more matter-of-fact. We children had to do a lot of chores from an early age and independence was emphasised. Everything was precisely planned and my parents' agenda set the pace. My father says of himself that he is a family man, but from my point of view his life was primarily characterised by work, performance and the associated stress. My mum also worked a lot and was also responsible for the household and us four children. Looking back, I think she was overwhelmed. I always wanted things to be different. My children are my greatest gift and I am grateful for them every day.

Secretly, I wish that we could stay together as a family for a long time to come.
together for a long time to come.

I very much want my children to have a very open and trusting relationship with me, so that they can always come to me with their concerns, needs and worries. I think they do, perhaps differently depending on their age and temperament. From my point of view, the bond with each of my children is exactly the same. However, I can't deny that the bond between my children and my wife is different, perhaps more emotional, as she is at home more than I am. But it also has to do with character: I'm more the rational, thoughtful type, my wife is the exact opposite. She has more sensitive antennae than I do and senses the children's worries and needs much more quickly. Our eldest son will be 17 at the end of the year and, to be honest, I'm already dreading the day when he moves out. I secretly hope that we can stay together as a family for a long time to come."

Read more about bonding:

• Binding: The special bondBondingis a life insurance policy. It is essential for children to develop healthily and become happy adults. But how does this emotional bond between a child and its parents develop and what fosters it? And is the role of the mother really so crucial?
• What does attachment have to do with school?Children come to school with a need for attachment and choose attachment figures who will be important for their further development. The decisive factor is how the teachers deal with the children's needs.
• «The bond between me and my children should not be a leash»
  Kinesiologist Matilda, 44, has a different bond with each of her three children, 12 and 10. This was already the case during pregnancy.
• «Bonding is more than just the interplay between mother and child »Katrin, 34, is an early childhood educator and mum to a 2-year-old boy. She believes that a good bond with a child requires support as a mother.
• What does attachment have to do with school?Children come to school with a need for attachment and choose attachment figures who will be important for their further development. The decisive factor is how the teachers deal with the children's needs.
• «The mother cannot and does not have to cover all of her child's needs alone »Psychologist Giulietta von Salis on the role of the mother in attachment research, who children particularly bond with and how the need for attachment changes during puberty.
• Attachment: this is how important fathers are
  When it comes to bonding, many people think of the relationship between mother and child. 5 reasons why fathers also play a central role in a child's development.
• «Mr Daum, why is bonding so important? »Zurich developmental psychologist Moritz Daum explains why a good relationship with parents is so important for a child's development. He also sheds light on self-regulation, early intervention and why parents should not underestimate their kindergarten child.
• When a secure attachment is lackingForhealthy development, a child needs a secure attachment to one or more adults. If this is missing, the child withdraws and finds it difficult to make friends. This can lead to attention deficit disorders, aggression and depression. The key now is to respond sensitively to the child's fears and needs.
• Remo Largo: «The amount of bonding time we have in Switzerland is a scandal!»His books are standard works for parents and his studies are among the most important in the field of child development research. At our talk in the Kulturpark, Remo Largo spoke about the social behaviour of children and young people - and got quite political in the process.