How to behave well - on the Internet

While classic etiquette was intended to ensure that nobody embarrassed themselves at official events and that social interaction worked, netiquette focuses on polite behaviour. However, netiquette is not mandatory - and seems to have been forgotten in recent years. After all, it is well known that nowhere is swearing, swearing, blaspheming, lying, teasing, tormenting, coercing, threatening and bullying as unrestrained as on the Internet.

Why is netiquette dusty?

The problem was that netiquette did not develop at the extremely fast pace of technical innovation, but instead stood still. One of the usual recommendations at the time, for example, was to be brief online.

People say things to each other online that they would never say offline in a face-to-face conversation.

If you wanted to access the internet, you had to log in with a modem and then log out again. Today, thanks to flat rates, we are permanently «on» and emails are not a useful addition to personal letters, but have almost replaced them.

While free chats have largely been replaced by Whatsapp and other messengers, the smartphone has also been added, which is proving to be incredibly practical, but is also bringing completely new bad habits to light. For example, when a mobile phone is placed on the table next to a fork, knife and spoon at mealtimes as a matter of course.

And on social networks, the brutalisation of language can be observed on a daily basis. Apart from hate speech and agitation, it is not only those who hold a different political opinion who are insulted. Even on more innocuous topics such as education, the sparks can fly.

Why is the tone on the net so harsh?

The good thing about the internet is that anyone can join in. However, this free accessibility is often misunderstood as an outlet for anger and frustration in order to let off steam. Psychologists explain the resulting lack of inhibition with disembodiment. People say things to each other online that they would never say offline in a face-to-face conversation.

Anyone who doesn't abide by the rules or laws is taking away more rights than the rest.

It is particularly thought-provoking that some people no longer even feel the need to hide behind their anonymity; they even dish out volleys of vulgarity under their real names as a special sign of their strength of opinion. However, if the rules of social interaction are suspended online, this can have fatal consequences for our society.

Those who do not abide by the rules or laws take more rights for themselves than the rest. However, this leads to others either becoming victims of their ruthlessness or no longer honouring agreements. The inhibition threshold drops overall, and it is only a small step from verbal violence online to physical violence in real life. The Internet is not a lawless space either.

Being decent also serves your own interests

With the help of netiquette, good online behaviour learnt at an early age is prevention and an effective means of combating further online brutalisation. We adults may recognise the personal and legal consequences of our actions, but children and young people do not.

On the one hand, they see how disrespectful strangers act online, while on the other, they themselves witness verbal violence in their daily interactions via WhatsApp or Instagram. This not only puts a strain on friendships and class relationships, but also has completely different consequences for their future.

The phrase «the Internet forgets nothing» takes on an even more important meaning here. It is well known that employers enter the names of their applicants into search engines. In doing so, they come across their online activities, no matter how long ago they may have been.

For this reason alone, netiquette in parenting is a useful addition to the rules we agree with our children. Polite and respectful behaviour is always important - whether on the internet or in real life.

New ethics - also for providers

However, netiquette never stands still, but is constantly evolving. Online services are changing, new devices and challenges are coming our way. That's why we as a society and/or community need to keep an eye on developments and constantly update the rules of etiquette.

In my opinion, however, an extension would be necessary. With netiquette, we - the users of the internet - create rules for general protection and thus take responsibility for our actions. But what about netiquette for the providers of such services?

What kind of good and polite treatment of us customers is this supposed to be when smartphone companies record our movement profiles or social networks spy on us? Here, too, a new ethic is urgently needed.

Old and new rules of netiquette for children and adults - an extract

Smartphone:

• Those present should be given preference in the conversation

• Do not use your phone too loudly in public places

• Use flight mode when eating together or in a restaurant

• Do not place smartphones on the table while eating

• Do not use your smartphone when picking up the children or driving

News apps:

• Think first and read again, then send

• Do not settle disputes online

• Do not forward chain letters

• Stay polite

• No insults

• Calm down, don't react reflexively to every message

Social networks:

• Do not share personal information about yourself too generously

• Remain objective despite the joy of opinion

• No verbal abuse and insults

• Be careful with irony, can be misunderstood

• Distinguish between internal and external communication: Am I only writing to one person or is everyone reading along?

Photos:

• Do not take photos of strangers or post them online

• Do not simply forward photos

• Violent photos and videos may not be disseminated

• Observe copyright

• Do not send photos to strangers