How parents and teachers work well together

Collaboration between parents, teachers and school management is not always easy in everyday school life. Differing expectations, misleading communication and unsuitable means of communication can lead to conflicts that put a strain on co-operation. It is extremely important for the child that their close carers at home and at school understand each other. After all, they are important people in the child's life and are often their role models.

Two roles - two perspectives

It is important that both sides realise from the outset that they are cooperation partners in different roles and with different perspectives. Parents see their child from a very close and personal perspective, which is characterised by a wealth of shared experiences. As representatives and those responsible for their children's education, they are experts on the family environment. For example, they expect the teacher to recognise and support their child in the best possible way. Good accessibility is also often important for parents. Some would like to have access to the teacher via text message, telephone or email whenever possible.

Cooperation between parents and teachers requires mutual interest, openness and respect.

Teachers are responsible in particular for learning in the classroom, for promoting interdisciplinary skills and for social learning. They ensure safety and well-being in the classroom. As educational professionals, they are experts in learning, support (of the children) and classroom management. Teachers expect parents to recognise this role and not make it their own. The need for accessibility is offset by the desire on the part of teachers to recognise the important distinction between school and private life.

Success factors for cooperation

The children, the parents and the teachers all benefit from good cooperation. Various factors contribute to success, some aspects of which are particularly worth mentioning: Cooperation between parents and teachers requires mutual interest, openness and respect. Parents and teachers should show a benevolent willingness to build relationships from the outset.

The initiative is usually taken by the school or the teacher. Class teachers make contact with parents by means of information or welcome letters, parents' evenings and parent-teacher meetings. During the school year, it is particularly important for parents to ask themselves when and with what medium the message should be communicated.

An open attitude and the confidence that the child's well-being is also at the centre of the teacher's attention are helpful.

This means, for example: Do I need to send a voice message to the teacher immediately at half past nine in the evening after my son has shown me the exam and I can't understand the assessment? Or is it enough if I ask my question at the next parents' meeting or simply accept the assessment? Do I have to call the teacher on my mobile phone a few minutes after my daughter has told me that she was insulted by classmates at school, or is an email the following day or a conversation at the next meeting enough? Is a phone call or, in the case of ongoing problems, a face-to-face conversation more effective? Of course, there are also urgent cases and emergencies. Different rules apply here and teachers are also available for parents at unconventional times.

Sound, time and place

Most people react emotionally when it comes to their own child. This is understandable and human. It is important to remain objective and constructive. Anything else is rarely effective. The famous «I-messages» are at the centre of this. They are helpful for good communication. They reflect personal impressions and explain how you yourself feel about a situation. A «My impression is that my quiet son is being ignored too much in your class and needs more attention from you» is much more acceptable to the other person than «You are not paying enough attention to my son». Feelings can vary and this is where a good conversation can begin.

If the conversation with the teacher is repeatedly unsuccessful, parents can turn to the school management. They are the next point of contact and can be involved in difficult or blocked situations. Even if everyone makes an effort, cooperation between school and parents is demanding and takes time. Conflicts can arise due to diverging expectations. It is then important to find local and situational solutions in the interests of the parents and teachers, but especially in the best interests of the child.

Communicate objectively

A fundamentally open and benevolent attitude and the confidence that the child's well-being and a positive, stimulating and supportive learning environment are at the centre not only for the parents but also for the teacher are helpful.

Most people react emotionally when it comes to their own child. That's human nature.

And if things ever seem different, you can always talk to the teacher in a respectful and objective manner using the appropriate communication channel. I keep my fingers crossed for all parents and teachers and wish them every success!

The Swiss Association of School Principals (VSLCH) and the Swiss Federation of Teachers (LCH) take turns to speak.