How do I reconcile family and job? 5 tips for parents
1. you are not perfect
All parents want to have enough time for their children, their partner, the household and their hobbies. But nobody manages to hold down a responsible job, always have time for the children, maintain a relationship, run a spotless household and serve friends a first-class dinner at the weekend. You have to recognise that there are only 24 hours in a day and that you can't stretch it out. You and your partner will have to cut back - say goodbye to the super-parent claim. Unless your name is Sheryl Sandberg (CEO of Facebook) or Melissa Meyers (Yahoo boss), who both employ an armada of nannies and domestic staff to juggle everything.
2. you are not alone
Work-life balance is not an individual problem. In hundreds of thousands of Swiss families, mothers and fathers practise the balancing act between family and job every day. So it's high time to be honest with yourself: Admit to yourself that in the vast majority of cases, either your job or your family will suffer if you try to live out both parts equally. Only those who suffer from a split personality can do this. The second step: Talk about your situation. Discuss your dilemma with friends, family and at work. This is the only way to turn the obvious into the obvious.
Say goodbye to the idea of having to be a super parent.
3. ask yourself a few questions
For example this one: How much money do we need at least to live? How can it be earned? Who will take maternity leave, and how long should it last? Who wants to invest how much time in the job? And: How much childcare and household help can we afford? For whom is which professional development step important at which point in time? How much time do we want to spend with our children? How can we sensibly divide up the household within these framework conditions? You don't always find a solution straight away. Once you have found one, you have to rethink it again and again. Nothing is forever, especially not with children.
4. define rules
At the football pitch with your son and your smartphone is vibrating? We all know only too well what happens when the boss calls in the evening or at the weekend. You reach for your smartphone, read, type and type, on and on. What do you do? Realise your own role in your partnership, family and working life. Develop an awareness of the fact that you don't have to be available to your employer around the clock. And set rules for working at home with your family.
5. you have every reason to be proud
Are you one of those parents who constantly apologise? For the fact that you work? For not working? That your child is ill? Or that you are busy with your child? Forget about it. On the playground or at school events, you whisper into the phone when your boss calls and asks for something. No, you don't have that document in front of you right now because you're not at your desk, you're with the children. Stop it. Why do you feel so guilty? You are looking after your children. There is no more valuable, more meaningful, more sustainable activity.
Why do you feel guilty? You are looking after your children. There is no more meaningful, valuable and sustainable activity.
When managers shout into their mobile phones at Munich or London airports, they are demonstrating: I am important. A little of their self-confidence can't do you any harm. Anyone who, like you, fights the battle to reconcile work and family life every day is just as important and deserves respect and recognition. The statistics prove you right: model calculations such as those by the Prognos Institute in Basel have shown that part-time work generates a «return on investment» of 25 per cent for companies. In plain language: if a company invests 100 francs in a part-time model, it gets 125 francs back. The company benefits from fewer sick days and more productive and better motivated part-time employees. Remember this the next time you whisper into the phone because you're not sitting at your desk. And at your next appraisal interview.
Image: Plainpicture
This text was published as part of our dossier on reconciling work and family life. Read all the texts in our current issue. You can order it here.
Read more:
- Die Lüge von der Vereinbarkeit.
