«Help, our daughter is defiant when dad comes home!»
You can't force joy. Perhaps your daughter simply needs a longer warm-up phase. Make sure that your little one doesn't cool down. Perhaps a daily Skype call is enough to keep dad close by on weekdays. Dad could say «goodnight» every evening and continue an important, warm ritual even in his absence.
Ask your daughter how she feels about her father's absence. She obviously has different feelings to her brother and shows them in her own way. Your husband could contribute to the relationship with her by checking in more often from a distance and taking an interest in the children's lives. He could make phone calls, send videos and consciously spend time alone with a child at the weekend.
Perhaps your husband could talk to your daughter on the phone more often during the week. Or at the weekend, if your daughter wants to, he could go shopping with her on his own. You can't force happiness and you can at best minimise the sadness of being away, but you can't eliminate it completely. And the more you focus on the effects of any measures, the more things will go wrong anyway.