«Help, I love a child more»

Nicole AlthausDas Herz ist eben kein Apfel, den man einfach halbieren und ganz gerecht aufteilen kann. Ihre Söhne wissen das aus eigener Erfahrung. Auch ihnen ist in vielen Situationen der Papa oder die Mama näher. Und das ist total okay so. Sagen sie dem Kleinen und dem Grossen: «Ich hab dich lieb.» Das «beide gleich» können sie hervorzaubern, wenn es Smarties zu teilen gibt. Oder einen Apfel.
Nicole Althaus
The heart is not an apple that you can simply cut in half and divide up fairly. Your sons know this from their own experience. In many situations, mum or dad is closer to them too. And that's totally okay. Tell the little one and the big one: «I love you.» They can conjure up the «both the same» when there are Smarties to share. Or an apple.
<img alt="Tonia von GuntenIt's a fact that we don't like everyone equally, even when it comes to our children. One child is often closer to us than the other. This is because they behave differently and we don't necessarily like everything about them. The children usually feel the same way about us parents. Accept your own feelings instead of fighting them, and next time put it like this: «I like you both. Sometimes more, sometimes less. In some situations, I have the feeling that I understand my first son better. Maybe we are just more alike. Dear sons, what do you think?»« src="https://c02.purpledshub.com/uploads/sites/87/2021/08/492e405b66cc771f04873014409e1b75.jpg» />
Tonia von Gunten
It's a fact that we don't like everyone equally, even when it comes to our children. One child is often closer to us than the other. This is because they behave differently and we don't necessarily like everything about them. The children usually feel the same way about us parents. Accept your own feelings instead of fighting them, and next time put it like this: «I like you both. Sometimes more, sometimes less. In some situations, I have the feeling that I understand my first son better. Maybe we are just more alike. Dear sons, what do you think?»
Peter SchneiderNein, bloss nicht. Es muss auch unausgesprochene Dinge zwischen Eltern und Kindern geben können. Wahrscheinlich merken die Kinder das auch ohne ein solches Bekenntnis. Vielleicht ist es bei Ihrer Frau umgekehrt; dann haben Sie Glück gehabt. Ausserdem ist Kindern die Situation, dass man auch jeweils seinen Elternteilen nicht gleich nahe ist, durchaus vertraut. Sie sollten wenigstens darauf achten, dass aus den ungleichen Gefühlen keine reale Benachteiligung oder Bevorzugung erwächst. Etwas bewusste Kompensation kann nicht schaden.
Peter Schneider
No, certainly not. There must also be unspoken things between parents and children. The children probably realise this even without such a confession. Maybe it's the other way round with your wife, in which case you're lucky. In addition, children are very familiar with the situation of not being equally close to their parents. You should at least make sure that no real disadvantage or favouritism arises from the unequal feelings. A little conscious compensation can do no harm.