From full-time mum back to work

In our series «We ask ourselves ...», we at Fritz+Fränzi ask each other questions from the big family universe. Foundation Secretary Éva Berger answers the question posed by Renata Canclini, Sales Manager.

«Dear Éva, with three teenagers at home, you went from being a full-time mum back to working full-time. What was that like for you?»

Renata Canclini

Dear Reni, it was hard. Difficult, exhausting and simply hard, I can't say it any other way. But it was also necessary and good, because my husband and I got divorced at the time and I needed an income.
But it's not quite true that I went from 0 to 100; I had already been working from home for my husband's company for five years before I returned to work. But entering the «real world of work» was something completely different.
My sons were 15, 14 and 12 years old when I returned to work 10 years ago and it was a big change for them too. Before, I was there for them around the clock. Whereas before I might have spoilt them a little and taken a lot off their hands at home, they had to become much more independent in one fell swoop with a mum who worked 100%. That was good for them.
And I also had to learn that I couldn't run the household in the same way as before. As a perfectionist, that wasn't easy for me.

Éva Berger with her sons.
Éva Berger with her sons.

Before the children were born, I had worked in a bank for three years, but of course nobody was waiting for a business graduate who had been a mum for the past fifteen years and whose German was not yet as good as it is today. I looked for a job for a year and a half until I found my current job with the help of a couple friend.
At first I was very nervous and insecure, I wanted to do everything more than right and was really struggling with my German in a business environment. Fortunately, my boss was very understanding and my office colleague at the time supported me.
My ex-husband and I had agreed that we wouldn't go through with the divorce until I had a job. When I started my job, he soon moved to the other end of Switzerland. So the children were almost always with me, and sometimes I would have liked a break. My family lives far away from Zurich and I didn't have any money for external help, at least not at the beginning of my return to work. But I don't harbour any grudges, everything is fine the way it turned out. We have a great time together, my sons and I, and we 're all proud of each other.
Looking back, I have to say that I should have gone back to work much earlier. If I had the chance again, I would go back to work with a small workload straight after the birth. My work helped me a lot with my self-esteem , especially in connection with the separation. But as I said, today everything is fine as it is and I'm very grateful for that.

The next question goes to Benjamin Muschg, Production Manager:

«Dear Benjamin, you live with your wife and child, but without a marriage licence. How is that for you?»

Éva Berger

The answer will follow in about two weeks ...

Éva Berger arbeitet als Stiftungssekretärin bei der Stiftung Elternsein, die das Elternmagazin Fritz+Fränzi herausgibt. Die gebürtige Ungarin hat drei erwachsene Söhne. 
Éva Berger works as a foundation secretary at the Elternsein Foundation, which publishes the parenting magazine Fritz+Fränzi. Born in Hungary, she has three grown-up sons.

Previously published in the «We ask ourselves» section:

  • Editor-in-chief Nik Niethammer answers the question: Dear Nik, do your children still believe in Father Christmas and the Christ Child?
  • Editor Florina Schwander answers the question: Dear Florina, do your twins get the same presents for Christmas?
  • Lead author Claudia Landolt answers the question: How does it feel to be a woman with five men and a dog?
  • Deputy Editor-in-Chief Evelin Hartmann answers the question: How do you manage the bilingualism of High German and Swiss German?
  • Patrik Luther, Deputy Publishing Director, answers the question: What is it like when the children have a big age difference?
  • Florian Blumer, Head of Production, answers the question: How do you manage to distribute work, family and household equally?
  • Bianca Fritz, Head of Online, answers the question: What is it actually like to work for a parenting magazine when you are (still) childless?
  • Sales Manager Jacqueline Zygmont answers the question: How do you let go when your son (20) is slowly fledging?
  • Sales Manager Corina Sarasin answers the question: What is the relationship like with your godchildren?
  • Publishing assistant Dominique Binder answers the question: What is it like to grow up as an only child?
  • Managing Director of Stiftung Elternsein, Thomas Schlickenrieder, answers the question: Family in different time zones: What is it like when your son is studying abroad?
  • Author Claudia Landolt answers the question: What to cook for four greedy boys?
  • Sales Manager Renata Canclini gives tips on how to make life work as a patchwork family.