Bullying: All against one

In my first years at primary school, I was part of a trio: three girls who spent their school breaks and every free afternoon together. We were a close-knit team - most of the time. But sometimes things got out of hand and we lived up to the truism that three is one too many: one of us was excluded. I remember well the times when it happened to me: the breaks when I wasn't allowed to play, the despair when my clothes were gone after swimming lessons and not even my pants were left.

I don't remember what brought things back to normal, but it was usually over after a few days. But what was an unfortunate episode in my case becomes a permanent condition for some children - because they are victims of bullying. Twenty years ago, practically nobody knew the term; today it's a buzzword. «We have a strong awareness of the problem,» says Eveline Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger, one of Switzerland's leading bullying researchers and currently a visiting professor at the Interdisciplinary Centre for Integration and Migration Research at the University of Duisburg-Essen. «Previous generations saw it as normal for children to torment each other. It was believed to toughen them up. Fortunately, today there is a different consensus.» Nevertheless, the term bullying is often used prematurely and therefore in the wrong context. This is fatal for the victims, says the expert: «In order to protect them, adults need to know what bullying actually is.» Parents and teachers should therefore first sharpen their awareness of the problem and the associated dynamics in order to be able to contribute to fair behaviour among children.

What distinguishes disputes from bullying

So what is bullying? My exclusion from the aforementioned group of three certainly doesn't count as bullying: It only happened to me occasionally at most and - this is also crucial - I wasn't the only one to be bullied, as the bullying happened on a regular basis, so to speak. «Bullying, on the other hand, refers to deliberately aggressive behaviour that is systematically and repeatedly directed at a particular child over a period of at least several weeks,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger.

However, not all aggressive behaviour that occurs repeatedly can be classified as bullying: «If, for example, a child repeatedly and indiscriminately harasses classmates, this is not bullying. Bullying is a group phenomenon and is characterised by an imbalance of power. A few children usually bully an inferior child together at the behest of a leader, who has little chance of fighting back.»

Interplay of direct and indirect aggression

Conflicts, on the other hand, are disputes with comparatively equal participants. A conflict is when, for example, kindergarteners quarrel over a shovel or a dispute breaks out in a youth group. «Conflicts are about opposing views or goals; usually one thing takes centre stage,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger. Disputes and conflicts are an important part of social development because they teach children to negotiate solutions and find compromises. «Bullying, however, does not offer any learning opportunities,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger, «but rather impairs the healthy development of all those involved.» In the long term, victims often suffer from anxiety, depressive moods or suicidal tendencies, while researchers have found that perpetrators have an increased risk of later drug abuse and breaking the law. And: the risk of being affected by dropping out of school, depression or alcohol abuse increases even for uninvolved witnesses to the event.

The risk of depression, alcohol abuse or dropping out of school increases even for uninvolved witnesses of bullying.

When bullies hit their victims, insult them or damage their belongings, we are talking about direct bullying: Here, it is clear who is beating whom up. Indirect bullying, where perpetrators avoid open confrontation, is more difficult to recognise. Rolling their eyes when the victim speaks up, «accidentally» putting their foot in their way, excluding them from the group or spreading rumours - these are typical forms of indirect bullying. «Perpetrators can reinterpret these actions in their favour,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger. «If they are confronted, for example, they dismiss the nasty rumours as a joke or portray rough jostling as an accident.» Bullying is usually a combination of direct and indirect aggression: «Teachers should therefore take even seemingly harmless incidents seriously if they always affect the same child.» Direct and indirect forms of bullying also occur on the internet, which gave science a new area of research a good 15 years ago: cyberbullying.

How many children and young people are affected by bullying? «Scientific data on this is not free of inconsistencies,» warns Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger. «This is due, for example, to different measuring instruments, respondents or definitions of bullying.» Figures should therefore be treated with caution. Based on international data, it is assumed that around 20 to 30 per cent of children and adolescents are involved in bullying, according to the researcher. One of the most widely recognised studies in this context is a 2005/2006 survey of over 20,000 young people from 44 countries. According to the study, around 11 per cent of those surveyed are bullies and around 13 per cent are victims, with boys (14 per cent) being victims slightly more often than girls (11 per cent). «This is consistent with findings from countless individual studies,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger. «Overall, it shows that there are more victims than perpetrators and that boys are more often victims than girls.»

Initially, research focussed primarily on the relationship between perpetrator and victim, but today we know that this view falls short, says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger: «Bullying is a form of violence that normally arises in the group, is maintained by the group and is also covered up.» The problem therefore always affects the whole group or class, as every child plays their part in the incident. Victims, perpetrators and followers are directly involved, who help to torment the affected child or act as reinforcers, for example by laughing at the attacks. The largest subgroup is that of indirect participants: witnesses who passively watch or run away, as well as helpers who stand up for the victim. «However, the latter is rather rare,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger.

The silence of all those involved is typical: bullies conceal their actions, victims fear rejection.

Bullying is difficult to stop once it has gained momentum. «The people involved become more and more trapped in their role,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger, «including the bullies. The feedback from their peers makes them feel strong. But in return, their peers also expect them to provide entertainment.» Meanwhile, the silent majority are often afraid of becoming victims themselves or are simply overwhelmed by the question of how to solve the problem. «Over time, this creates a bullying-friendly climate in a group or class,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger, «and at some point it is considered normal for the victim to be beaten up. Then even the so-called uninvolved witnesses feel less affected.»

Parents should take these warning signs seriously

The silence of those involved is typical of all types of bullying. Bullies conceal their misdeeds from adults, and research has long shown that victims often do not confide in anyone for fear of not being taken seriously or being labelled as a snitch. «It is therefore crucial to be vigilant and recognise possible warning signs as such,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger. Although, according to the expert, there are no symptoms that clearly indicate bullying, parents should take the following warning signs seriously:

• Häufige Klagen über Kopfweh, Bauchweh, Übelkeit, Appetitlosigkeit
• Schlafstörungen
• Nachlassende Schulleistungen 
• Ängstlichkeit und zunehmender Rückzug
• Verletzungen, blaue Flecken
• Zerstreutheit und fehlende Konzentration
• Abwertende Bemerkungen des Kindes über sich selbst
• Das Kind «verliert» regelmässig persönliche Sachen oder bringt sie beschädigt nach Hause

If parents are worried that something is wrong, the first thing to do is to talk to the child. How should they go about it? «It's best not to open the door straight away and confront the child with your suspicions,» says Wolfgang Kindler. The former secondary school teacher is the author of several books on bullying and advises schools. It is advisable to start the conversation with everyday observations: «I've noticed that you've hardly been getting any calls recently and that you're often depressed. I'd like to talk to you about it.» If the child refuses, parents should not put pressure on them and try to talk again at the next opportunity, says Kindler. If the child opens up, parents should limit their role to listening and refrain from giving advice - especially advice that the child should fight back. «Most victims have fought back, but unsuccessfully,» says Kindler. «With such statements, parents indirectly blame the child for the problem.»

Parents should listen and refrain from giving advice. Especially the advice that the child should fight back.

Then parents could ask: When did it start? How many are on the other side? Are there any classmates who show solidarity with the child? Again, according to Kindler, it is important to listen and not be tempted to threaten any measures («They could experience something!»). Dramatising («That makes me incredibly sad») is also not helpful. «Many victims of bullying don't want to burden their parents with their situation,» says Kindler. «It's therefore important that they don't react too emotionally, but develop possible courses of action together with the child.» Kindler also advises against confronting perpetrators personally or contacting their parents: «This usually makes the victim's situation worse.»

The school has a duty to ensure that children feel safe

«Children have a right to feel safe at their school. If this right is jeopardised, the school must take action,» says Christian Stalder. He is the head of a vocational school in Graubünden, a former school social worker and founder of the counselling centre mobbing.gr. If the child confides in the parents, the next step is to inform the teacher and get their assessment. During the conversation, parents should refrain from making accusations against other children and instead describe what they observe, for example: «My child suffers when they are not allowed to play during the break.» Then they should ask the crucial questions: What does the school do about bullying? Who can intervene professionally? What are the next steps to protect the child?

«The response from the school is often that they will monitor the situation,» says Stalder. «In concrete terms, this means There is no plan.» In this case, Stalder advises parents to ask the school to submit proposals for measures in a timely manner. «In the case of bullying, it is also crucial that a specialist accompanies the intervention,» says Stalder. «Otherwise it can backfire.» For example, if the victim is publicly pitied in front of the class, they run the risk of being labelled a tattletale and punished.

There are various concepts to combat bullying in schools. Most are geared towards prevention; programmes aimed at ending acute cases are rare. And their success is modest if the school only reacts when action is needed and does not have a concept that counteracts bullying on several levels, says Stalder. «A negative group dynamic that has solidified unhindered over months can hardly be broken, especially at higher school levels,» says Stalder. «Then the belief that the class is ready to contribute to solutions is an illusion. You have to intervene before things get out of hand.»

Schools lack knowledge, contact persons and concepts

«Often nothing happens until the emergency arrives,» says researcher Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger from her work with schools and teachers. «Then there are fire drills, the perpetrator may go into timeout and the victim goes to another school. This shows that schools lack knowledge, contact persons and concepts.» One of the main reasons for this shortcoming is the fact that there are no mandatory prevention programmes for Swiss schools. In Finland, for example, these programmes are even prescribed by the state. «In this country, schools are largely left alone with the problem,» says Gutzwiller-Helfenfinger. They usually only address the issue when the need for action is acute, or consider it to be the responsibility of the teachers to take action. This leads to uncertainty: «Many teachers are afraid to turn to their colleagues in the event of turbulence. They don't want to be seen as the one with the problem class.»

Highly effective year-round programme

A look across the border shows how things can be done better: the German state of Baden-Württemberg launched the Olweus programme in 2015, named after the Norwegian psychologist Dan Olweus, who developed it in the 1980s. Studies confirm that Olweus is highly effective: in countries such as Norway, Sweden and the USA, the programme has been able to reduce cases of bullying in schools by up to 50 per cent. A fundamental difference between Olweus' programme and other approaches is that social issues are addressed throughout the school year. The following principles take centre stage:

• Erwachsene, sowohl Lehrkräfte als auch Eltern, nehmen am Leben der Kinder teil und greifen ein, wenn sie merken, dass etwas nicht stimmt.
• Schüler und Lehrpersonen handeln gemeinsam Verhaltensregeln aus und überlegen sich, wie bei Verstössen gegen diese vorzugehen ist.
• Schüler und Lehrpersonen definieren gemeinsam Konsequenzen, die bei einem Verstoss gegen die Verhaltensregeln auch eintreten.
• Die Schüler werden ermutigt, aufeinander zu achten und Bescheid zu geben, wenn etwas passiert, das nicht mit den Abmachungen übereinstimmt.

In Baden-Württemberg, a team of researchers from Heidelberg University Hospital is testing the effectiveness of the programme. «The data collected so far from almost 6,000 pupils shows a significant reduction in bullying on both the victim and perpetrator side,» summarises Franz Resch from the Department of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. «Affected pupils report that they have confided in us more often, and the proportion of long-term cases in which the bullying has been going on for at least a year is also falling.» Schools that take part in the programme receive extensive support during the 18-month implementation period. The teaching staff, school social workers, all children and even their parents are gradually involved.

Many teachers are afraid to approach their colleagues. They don't want to be seen as the one with the problem class.

There are currently no comparable efforts in Switzerland. However, material is available - for example from Françoise Alsaker, who was part of Olweus' research team and developed her bullying prevention programme Be-Prox based on his approach, which was scientifically evaluated at the University of Bern. It contains extensive practical tips that teachers can implement in their everyday work. «Bullying is not a problem that only experts can solve,» the researcher is convinced. «What is needed is a clear stance against it.»