We say: «Self-love is more important to us than good grades»
"For me, self-love has a lot to do with self-determination, deciding what and when you are allowed to do something. I always wanted my children to feel what they wanted and to be allowed to fulfil these needs. For example, my children loved wellies more than anything when they were little. They ran around in them at all times of the day and year. I didn't care how the other mums looked at me when they turned up in the playground in summer clothes and wellies when it was 25 degrees and sunny.
They are bigger now and my job is to encourage them to communicate their needs clearly. It is not only important to me that they take themselves and their feelings seriously, but also that they treat themselves and their environment with love.
Sometimes I am the lightning rod
My daughter is seven years old and still completely harmonious and without doubts, she says what she thinks and is completely herself. The boys, on the other hand, are big self-doubters. The younger one once came home crying because some of his clique had made a joke at his expense.
At times like this, he is beside himself and doesn't allow any closeness - I am then his lightning rod, I get to experience his feelings unfiltered and sometimes things get broken. It's exhausting, but I accept it because he can express his feelings. Sometimes he's also afraid to go to sleep at night.
So does his older brother. He has all kinds of thoughts about life and death, illness and dying and the meaning of life in general. At times like these, they like it when I cuddle them, rub their backs and listen to them. If they are stressed about bad grades, I try to stay relaxed. It's more important to me that they retain their childlike light-heartedness and belief in themselves than that they excel at school with straight A's."
More articles on the topic of self-love:
- «Herr Orth, wie entsteht unser Selbstwertgefühl?»
- 7 Tipps, wie Sie das Selbstwertgefühl Ihres Kindes stärken
- Sich selbst etwas Gutes tun
- Selbstvertrauen und Selbstwertgefühl: Das starke Kind
- «Gefühle der Eltern beeinflussen den Selbstwert des Kindes»
- Wir erzählen: «Wir möchten nicht, dass die Schule den Selbstwert unserer Kinder schwächt»
- Ich erzähle: «Ein Kind ist kein Mini-Me»
