Temporary parents?

Anyone with a family knows that things don't always run smoothly. Children develop their own personalities and outgrow their parents. The negative influence of friends causes problems, as does school and career choices. Most of the time, however, parents manage to provide their children with a good home.

When does the state intervene?

In Switzerland, all minors have the right to be well cared for, supported and protected by the people who look after them. If mum and dad are so overburdened with the job of parenting that a child's well-being is at risk and they are unable to develop appropriately, the state is obliged to intervene.
The term «endangerment» is broadly defined in this context. In most cases, there are several factors on the part of the parents which, taken together, can trigger a crisis: Excessive demands, mental instability, illness, low level of education, no social network where they live, separation from their partner, debt, alcohol and substance abuse, criminality and so on.
Some of the mothers and fathers have an immigrant background, but often enough the parents in trouble are also Swiss. In the worst cases, the anger about their own failure is vented on the child, who sometimes has to watch the father beat the mother, for example. Another form of neglect is when the child has no regular daily routine, is often left alone and no one sits by their bed when they are ill. Provided there is a bed at all.

What are the consequences?

If the family of origin is unable to fulfil its mandate, the state symbolically takes over the care of the young person, stands by them and looks after their interests. In this case, it is represented by the child and adult protection authority (KESB). Paedagogues, psychologists, social workers and lawyers work side by side there. If a report is received, the authority is obliged to investigate it. The experts not only clarify the situation, they also advise, accompany and support the mothers and fathers so that they can better manage their everyday lives with their children. In many cases, the intervention by the KESB and the social services is successful. After all, most parents want the best for their children.
However, sometimes the support measures are not or only partially effective. Then it can happen that the authorities come to the conclusion that it is better to take a child away from the family of origin temporarily or permanently. Time passes before such a placement is made. Only if the child's health and life are in acute danger, if it is being mistreated or abused, or if it is left completely to its own devices, does it have to happen quickly.

Concern for the welfare of the child

The other way round is also conceivable. It is not uncommon for parents who are at breaking point to turn to the authorities and ask for help. This not only requires courage and the ability to reflect on their own situation. It is also impressive proof that mum and dad are very concerned about their child and its welfare.

Every hundredth child in Switzerland lives in a home or with a foster family.

In Switzerland, an estimated 15,000 children and young people live in foster families or homes instead of with their biological parents; in other words, one in every hundred children. While teenagers are more likely to be placed in institutions, the foster family model has proved particularly successful for younger children. In this model, other adults take on the day-to-day tasks that would normally be the responsibility of the parents.
The reasons are obvious: the younger a person is, the more likely they are to be able to bond with other people. In addition, young children in particular have a different sense of time; a year feels like an eternity. Very different arrangements can make sense from case to case. In addition to permanent care, where the child lives completely with the new family, there is also so-called weekly care, where the child returns to the family of origin on Saturdays and Sundays.

Short-term care may become necessary if, for example, the parents fall ill or, in very rare cases, are remanded in custody. Other models, such as respite care, aim to provide mum and dad with regular respite on an hourly or daily basis as required in prolonged, stressful situations.

Where can suitable foster families be found?

In the city of Zurich, the specialist centre for foster children has been part of the social services for many years and is responsible for the search, clarification, placement, supervision and support of suitable foster families. Centre manager Peter Hausherr knows that being placed in a foster home is always a drastic experience for girls and boys: «That's why we try to find the most suitable foster parents in each case.»
This is often successful straight away, provided that the specialist centre has enough foster families available. The «surrogate family» can either be a traditional couple or just one person. Anyone interested in this challenging task must go through a standardised assessment process in which the social workers responsible check whether they are fundamentally suitable for such a commitment.

When it comes to placing a particular child at a later stage, the fit between the child and a potential substitute family is scrutinised again. The child and their biological parents are involved in the selection process whenever possible. It is a painful thought, but mum and dad must emotionally support the decision in the interests of their offspring.

Only one in five foster children only gets to know their new parents in the course of the placement.

The staff at the specialist centre currently support 130 families in the city of Zurich who have taken in a girl, boy or sibling. Interestingly, 60 per cent of the children are looked after by close relatives such as grandparents, aunts or uncles. An estimated 20 percent are placed with people from the social environment of the family of origin, for example with godparents, the mother's good friend or a neighbouring family. In only around one in five cases did the foster child only meet their second parents during the course of the placement.

A demanding job

From the girls' and boys' perspective, it is always good if at least a few fixed points remain when their familiar world collapses. Placement in a familiar environment is often better, as the children can then continue to attend their usual school, for example. Siblings are placed together if possible. But even if a potential foster family can be found in the immediate neighbourhood, the specialists are obliged to carefully clarify the placement first.
Foster parents have a demanding job: they have to provide the children with a regular daily routine, give them a sense of security and boost their self-confidence - in short, they have to look after them. Ideally, this creates a close bond. However, the surrogate parents must be able to accept that the new family members sometimes display irritating behaviour patterns.
«In some cases, even very young foster children were responsible for many things in their first family: Choosing clothes, shopping, eating alone, possibly looking after their parents and younger siblings,» explains Peter Hausherr. «And now they're suddenly supposed to be a child again, to be cared for and to share in their everyday experiences?» This is an unsettling situation that can cause great tension on both sides. The new arrivals need a lot of time to get used to their roles, to understand how the new family «ticks» - and vice versa. Many girls and boys are also traumatised and have developmental delays.

Financial support

All of this can not only be nerve-wracking, but also very stressful for the foster parents and any biological children living in the household. That's why the specialist centre provides intensive support for «their» families, arranges and pays for further training and supervision in order to strengthen the second mothers and fathers and «siblings».
Of course, the surrogate parents also receive financial support from the biological parents or - in their place - from the towns and municipalities to cover their running costs. In addition, there is also compensation for the parenting work carried out. Depending on the situation, this can add up to between 900 and 2000 francs per month for permanent care in the canton of Zurich.

A foster child has a right to know as much as possible about their «real» parents.

A central point is the relationship with the family of origin. Children have a right to know as much as possible about their «real» mums and dads. Unless there are serious reasons not to, they should continue to have contact with their parents. And not only if their return is a declared or at least probable goal from the outset. It sounds absurd, but many girls and boys want to see with their own eyes that their parents are doing well despite everything. It is important that foster carers value the biological parents. In this way, they prevent the little ones from falling into a conflict of loyalty and help them to develop their own identity.
If it turns out that the meetings are too stressful for the girls and boys, the meetings must be organised differently or discontinued. The authorities - together with all those involved - regularly check whether it is possible for the child to return to their family of origin. If there is nothing to prevent it, this step is also planned carefully and prudently.

The foster child at the centre

A foster child is like a small planet with three moons orbiting around it: There is the family of origin who, despite everything, have an emotional bond with them, then the foster parents who represent the biological parents and, of course, the professionals, counsellors and representatives of the authorities. It doesn't take much imagination to visualise how dense the traffic on the orbits can become. Collisions are almost unavoidable. But as long as everyone involved accepts that the little planet is the centre of the universe and that everyone is only here because of it, things can work out.
The Zurich Specialist Centre for Foster Children is a public service. In some cases, however, it is not enough if the social workers are only available during office hours. There are complex care situations in which both the children and young people and the foster parents need particularly close support so that the placement can succeed and the minors can find peace and quiet.
Bussola is one of several companies in the family care sector that specialises in precisely such situations. The provider, which is based in eastern Switzerland, supports around 40 foster families in more rural areas. «We are available around the clock, 365 days a year, so that we can act quickly and flexibly in the event of crises or emergencies,» explains Gabriele Buss, social pedagogue and member of the management team. This means that if a situation comes to a head in a family of origin, Bussola - with a mandate from the relevant authorities - can provide a suitable place in a foster family within 24 hours. And if things get difficult there, Bussola employees are also quickly on hand to defuse conflicts.

«Third-party placements are on the decline»

Gabriele Buss, social education worker

Last year, Bussola placed a total of 103 minors in alternative care, two thirds of whom were teenagers, and it was often a kind of time-out. «We are seeing an increase in enquiries, but the number of definitive out-of-home placements is falling,» says Buss. «Social services are increasingly succeeding in preventing out-of-home placements with outpatient measures such as educational counselling, school social work or family support.»
The specialist expressly welcomes this development, as it shows that we are on the right track. «However, we will only reach our goal when all children can grow up in their families of origin.»

Read more:

Foster families are the big topic in our June/July 2017 issue. In it you will find many touching reports and expert opinions. Order the magazine here